For years I had a deep-seated phobia of the Neil Young album “Trans”... I hope one day to be forgiven by my fellow commentators.

I think she's amazing. And I still love all three Crystal Castles records, even though for her I suspect they're ancient history.

Actually your butthole appears to be entirely occupied by the rotting cantaloupe known as your head. Ashes to ashes, or in your case assholes to assholes.

Frankly, I had no idea the sand was this disgusting. I'm never shitting on the beach again.

It makes me feel slightly better about the two bottles of Robitussin I drink every night before bed.

It has been covered extensively on Jezebel (or maybe Gawker). I’m reluctant to say more since I have no basis for assessing the validity. Depressing to contemplate nonetheless.

Speaking of high school, you forgot the decimal point.

I tend to agree with you. Also I’m more sympathetic to “inappropriate” or “offensive” comedians if they are actually funny - e.g. Louis CK (nothing funny about the rumors though), Sarah Silverman (almost not included b/c she slept with Jimmy Kimmel).

Walkers, ranked in terms of usefulness to society: 1. Jerry Jeff Walker, 2. JJ Walker, 3. Walkers from “Walking Dead” (various), 666. Scott Walker

On the other hand, think of the inspiration she's provided to reckless Trans Am drivers everywhere. I only wish there were an idiotic award I could proffer.

Don't rule out dogshit-on-toast (could be popular in UK), sweaty cheesebucket, or my personal favorite - creamy brains deluxe. Walkers like that too.

How dare you mock SRSFACE! SRSFACE was killing Qaddafi with his bare hands in Saigon while you were crawling around in Huggies!

In the absence of Trump, one wonders with whom the winner was obliged to sleep. I would say Ricardo Montalban, but I think he's dead.

Agreed. Also I think she’s underrated as a comedic actor. Her timing on “King of Queens” is impeccable. Anyone who says otherwise needs to go lick a donut.

I wasn't suggesting that Cosby be written out of history. His influences are undeniable. Nor do I advocate scrubbing the Confederate flag from national consciousness. Unpleasant truths should be confronted head-on.

They don't need to distance themselves from slaveowners like Jefferson. They do need to tell the truth about that facet of his life, along with his various positive contributions.

I think you’re right. There’s nothing “cool” about smoking garfong when you can buy it from a vending machine in the men’s room of the Tallahasee greyhound station.

We used to accidentally dress our toddler in full Nazi regalia for St. Patrick’s Day. Awkward? Oh hell to the yeah.

Action Bronson... Bronsalino... Bam Bam!!! Please try to stay with us here on our humble hip hop habitat!

Also, do police dogs scoop their own poop? And if not, do they fine themselves $250 dollars? If so, that might help explain the rampant corruption in their rabid ranks.