On Sunday night, the utterly meaningless Miss USA pageant aired, and a soon-to-be-forgotten woman from Nevada won the title.

Thank you. Well said. The fact that larger numbers of people are growing fatter does not magically make 'fat' into 'normal'.

Mekayla Diehl's body is normal. It isn't the average American woman's body, but it is absolutely normal. Her body is not abnormal or unusual.

I want to commend the dispatcher for being so calm on the phone. Once Laura (of the Jezebel Becks) and I called the police to report a man waving some kind of weapon of the street and the dispatcher said "OH...OH MY GOD!" #helpful

Well, that would have been pretty rich coming from an American.

I'd sacrifice Jon Snow if we could just get Oberyn back.

Gosh, how ever will I live if I can't pre-order a movie??

Um, exactly. I left race out of the equation to see if all I saw was black celebrities. I didn't, so you're wrong. Super simple.

So, I went and googled "articulate celebrity interview".

Would you say Milkshake brings all the boys to the yard? (I am deeply sorry for writing this.)

There's a great video of a group of cows being let out after a long winter and scampering around in the grass.

Let's call it what it really was, a concentration camp for unwed mothers and their children. I do hope we've learned something from this and make sure it never, ever happens again.

This isn't cancer—it's a social movement. In this case, they don't need vast sums of money to fix the problem; they just need people to realize how fucking dumb of a name it is. In this case, "raising awareness" is the only thing that's going to fix the problem. (Money will help, but only insofar as it will buy…

Hi, Dan.

Go ahead, assholes. Tell us again how "only white people and like seven Indians" care about this issue.

Crazy as it is for as much MURICA sentiments about how unfair it is, all Sterling owns is the value of the team. He doesn't own the players, the arena, or the intellectual property of the team...he manages it for the NBA. Granted, he's recompensed quite well, but as long as he's reimbursed for the value of the…

His property isn't getting "taken from him." It's getting liquidated, and he's getting the money. What's getting taken from him is his membership in the NBA; they're a private enterprise and have decided they don't want him as a member.

"She is damaged."

Jesus you are spot on. If 'most young women love Salinger' then the same could be said for pretentious young men about Bukowski.

Once, on my way to New Orleans, I saw a car with a bumper sticker that said "Follow me to Waffle House." We were headed the same way for a while and that guy totally went to the nearest Waffle House. I was hoping for irony.