Do I think that the Sixers are heading in a better direction since his shenanigans? Sure. My argument more that all of said shenanigans have made him omnipresent for years to come. Whenever there’s a trade involving draft picks, odds are we’ll hear the name Hinkie somewhere close. Whispered into the night like that…

Oh wow! I just woke up to this. It’s an all-star game miracle!

Albert is a better cook than Magary. And much more charismatic and way handsomer.

Sixers have 1st round swap rights with Kings and their unprotected 1st round in 2019. Hinkie you bastard man.

Oh no I couldn’t!

I think if we were to look into his eyes, we might not like what we see!

My theory is that he’s like Cyclopes. But instead of shooting laser beams from his eyes, he shoots shitty music into our phones.

What would be worse, these glasses or transition lenses?

Literal rose tinted glasses.

I work at a beer store with a drive-through (essentially a garage with 2 doors). I’m working now actually! Customers sit in the drive through, walk in the store, meander around like dummies trying to decide what beer to get. This obviously holds up the line. How should I politely tell them to fuck off?

Barry, I just finished rereading Player Piano by Vonnegut. What book should I read next?

Boop.

Trump is the emodiment of erectile dysfunction.

Euro-peein all over my pun right now.

Sure, they bring a mammoth back to life but won’t resurrect my Nana to tell me what her secret casserole recipe was. Apparently, we don’t see eye to eye on what “important issues” mean.

“You can’t abort babies! You could be aborting a boy. And that boy could grow up and play for the Cowboys! I won’t let you ruin our Superbowl season!”

You’re a pun.