So THAT’S where the drum out of my washing machine went!

Darnit. Just 27 more and he would’ve had a 747. Then he might’ve been alright.

This just reminds me of the time that I was driving with my octogenarian grandmother in the passenger seat and we got passed by a pack of motorcyclists on crotch-rocket bikes. She immediately proceeded to start making fun of them. “Oooh, look, a big scary biker gang...on scooters!”

Maybe 2 or 3 times, the most recent of which was a driver on I-80 in broad daylight on Labor Day, varying his speed between about 60-85 and swerving back and fourth between both lanes and both shoulders, almost clipping several cars.

Wow, only one completely idiotic answer! The other three are actually good suggestions! Are you guys okay?

I feel like this was a missed opportunity for a good Fancy Kristen article.

Fun!

It reminds me of this for some reason.

Yup. Lexus in recent years seems to have cracked it. But Infiniti and especially Acura just aren’t quite there yet.

I get what he means. Not the ease-of-use part, but I don’t want the interior of my luxury SUV looking like a minivan.

Reminds me of the full loaded, brand-new Explorer I drove a few months back. Every bell and whistle you could want was there, but the interface itself still looked like a normal Ford, which isn’t something I’d want for $50k-$60k.

Drat, and I’m outside my time limit for editing as well.

I’m glad you said this, because whenever I make the proverbial eye roll comment at one of y’alls dumb suggestions (needs a safe, reliable family car for under $60k? What about a Citroen H-Van for $12k?!?!) people always tell me “Relax, it’s satyr/humor.”

Pictured here at top speed

RIP 500 Abarth and all your lovely little pops and burbles

That sounds like more of a thing with the individual than the car

I will say that V6 Genesis G80 offers pretty much all of what you’re talking about with the added bonus of RWD. And I don’t mean that for sporty reasons, because the basic G80 has no semblance of sportiness. I mean that for reasons of properness. It’s more expensive, so maybe more Cadillac than town car, but it’s…

As somebody who just got their hands on a Mk7 Jetta and loves it...I kinda wish I held out for this thing. Looks phenomenal aside from the color.

My guess is because that’s how 90% of them get used?

Apart from maybe the Regal TourX