Look at the freaking hose on this guy (still) and the third baseman’s reaction https://twitter.com/mariners/status/1107654108930965504?s=21

Service-y reminder: If you are ever in Japan, be sure to see a baseball game. 

Oh look, everybody! We got us a scientist up in this bitch!

Nah, I’m Banquet for life. Two of those combined are 700 cal, 48% from fat (38g), 0g trans fat, but still 24% of my daily fiber. https://banquet.com/pot-pies/chicken-pot-pie and look on in horror, but less horror than Marie Callender.

Superman would struggle like everyone else at golf. I want to see a whole miniseries of Supes losing his shit on the golf course and melting his clubs with his heat vision.

Englishman here, it's definitely not a thing.

For the last two months, Mané has been the best player wearing the Liverpool red.

So, you’re saying his room was Farmers Only?

The only person who appreciates Borat quotes in my house is MY WIIIFE

Totally. Back when I was young and lived in Pittsburgh, I would hit the Giant Eagle in Shadyside (the fancy one on Centre Ave) during Stillers games and it was a fucking breeze.

When is the optimal time to go to your local grocery store?

The optimum time to go to the grocery store is usually around 6am-8am on a weekday for maximal shopping efficiency.

Between 6-8 is when all the individual departments (seafood, meat, produce, etc.) in the grocery store get going. The interior ailes of the store were restocked by the overnight crew, but departments…

I thought that was a fairly level-headed comment, but I guess if you wanna go down this road, I’ll just channel the memories of my most recent argument with my wife about it annnnnd ok.  IT’S JUST A HOBBY! I CAN STOP ANYTIME I WANT, I DON’T WANT TO NOW THOUGH.  YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS OVERREACTING

*Kavanaugh snarl* I LIKE BEER. I LIKED IT BACK THEN AND I LIKE IT NOW.

I don’t get why letting your dog shit in the shower is a problem? Easy to bag afterwards and then you can just quickly Swiffer the germs and your all done, right?

Well, I hope Draymond at least sends you a card on Father’s Day.

Not that this vapid person needs my defense, but is it not possible that she just plainly fucked up and doesn’t realize it until now?

If they only ran one loop, they would have gotten their 6.4-mile split across then ran on to the finish line without doing the second loop.

Yesterday I picked up one of my two-year-old’s turds off the kitchen floor with a napkin.

I tell ya, golf courses and cemeteries are the biggest wastes of prime real estate.