Oh great.  Waddlers and Instawhores can vacay in Hobbiton.  How fabulous.  Still, at least they’re not screwing over people in dire need of affordable housing, the selfish pricks that the Air BnB infesters are.  

We’ve got a Thornbird over here!  Someone fetch the cold water!

Given how horrific my classmates at school were to each other (not to me, thank christ. I was lucky that I had a reputation for being scary, gay and able to punch someone’s throat in. I did it once, ffs) I’m eternally glad that social media was a figment of some shut-in’s imagination back in the 1990s.  

I can probably guess which British newspapers were asking about Winslet’s weight in the 1990s/early 2000s - the Daily Mail, the Sun, the Star and even The Guardian were interested in how much she weighed. Oh, of course the Graun would try and disguise it with a “but to put a healthy woman’s body into perspective...”…

How very dare you. Winslet is British. Her telly debut was in Dark Season - written by the legendary Russell T Davies and often seen as a teenage fanfic follow-on of Doctor Who - and she most definitely ain’t a Kiwi in that...

Sengstock said eventually Frank Houston sought his forgiveness. “He needed his forgiveness because he could not die and face God with this on his head,” Sengstock told the court.

And Richie had to put away his Theo James slash fiction writing for another day, the thirsty little whore-slut that he was too.  Never mind, Rich.  There’s always porn.  Off you trot.

Yup.  Wee Justin over there probably hasn’t heard of Elton John or the work he did on the (superior version of) The Lion King.  Wee soul.  We should pet it and feed it some attention.

Clone dance? Clone dance, you say? Clone dance we shall have!

*lobs sparkly grenade*

...still others use moonshine—the very original boilo add-in—instead of whiskey...

Yeah, that’s a UK McDonalds.  

How the living fuckadoodle are you considering Haribo “nostalgic”, Shure?  Catch yourself on...

Oh, so you do like watching paint dry?

And if that happens?  You get yourself on a flight over here to civilisation and we’ll take care of you.  

It’s all the Midwesterners have. That and the ‘phobias (interchangeable so you can try a new one each day!) That and shitty “Italian” beef. Hmm, wet sandwiches! Yummo!

*fetches flamethrower*

The one with the underwater critters that had absolutely no direction to go in?  Oh yes, I remember that.

Well, this is certainly a drink that screams “Basic Fat White Slut”.  

I think that was the point of the pocketwatch she destroyed - it was the only way to create a new Stub, the watch had a “record” of which time period for when the stub was created (the stubs can, theoretically, be created a divergent points measuring in the milliseconds) - hence why Flynne told the good doctor she…