probably got a good price on account of the whole murder thing

I kicked my tires every day until one kicked  back. Spent 3 days in the ER. Thanks god I have really good health insurance.

Volkswagen, right?  

I did this once, and 18 months later, boom! Dead battery. Never again.

Seriously, CPO means nothing. I made a mistake and trusted White Plains Lincoln when I bought one of their Manager’s 9 Month old MKZs (was registered to WPL). Turns out, AFTER it fell off a lift and killed a mechanic, they THEN ALSO crashed the car, bondo’d it up all over, sold it to me as an accident free CPO,…

This kind of stuff makes me so rage-y. I’d be interested in learning more about the judge (judges?) in this case, in what federal circuit this is being processed, and more about this Christopher Seeger cat. Judge rules that one lead counsel on a case going back 50 years is a good idea? This strikes me as odd...

I think I could get further in the city naked rather than in the suburbs. There’s like 30 people shot in Chicago every day, car jackings, muggings, other naked crazies furiously swinging their dick back and forth so it hits their thighs making a slapping noise, for them to worry about you. You get a somewhat crowded…

It would be better to reconvert that camper into a solar oven. (wouldn’t be too hard), then cook bread, muffins, even pizza in the back while driving around to different office buildings.  And come on, those seat covers? You want to sell a vehicle, clean it up a bit.

Since we’re on the subject of bears...

No kidding — it’s a neat idea (I guess that he or somebody might have made it out of ULDs (standard cargo modules for jets) but as it sits it’d be an oven in the summer and a claustrophobe’s nightmare in winter. I’ll take my chances with Ursus killandconsumeus in order to have a few windows and a skylight, thank you…

Yes, he has a window to the front cab which looks out to the great outdoors. It’s not a camper where you sit back there on the highway. You go camping in a tent and zip up all the doors at night and you also have no windows. People have campers with Windows and then cover them up for privacy just the same as having no…

If owned by someone from our northernmost state, the bear could enjoy a nice “Baked Alaskan.”

David spade is trying so damn hard not to break and he’s completely failing

I know, you might as well stick a bear-sized turkey baster on the outside. 

NP, Here’s why. Drive this thing to Nevada and use it to storm Area 51. You can shelter in the giant aluminum box in the back, so that you can be surrounded by a Faraday cage of Aluminum in case the space Aliens try to probe your mind and your butt at the same time. 100% safe

The bears will love you after you spend all night slow roasting in that oven.   

It’s somehow actually worse than a Van Down by the River (tm).

I really, truly don’t understand the appeal of attending an NFL game unless you’re in a comped suite and you got free parking. I went to a Texans game last year where I was literally stuck next to a sweaty fat guy the whole time (or maybe a mirror). And the guy behind me kept yelling, “We need a first down!” as if it…

this was the Studio 54 principle at play