Is ... is everything okay, Torch?

Do I get a prize of intensifying the car?

Even among the myriad of disastrous decisions made by the British Motor Corporation, the short lived appoinment of John Wyndham as director of marketing still stands as possibly the worst.

“In that pivotal moment of a gently offered roast beef sandwich hot off the valve cover, Drew had concluded that she successfully re-homed Princess Clara’s Octopussoi.”

Hey, stop looking at instagram, I brought you avacado toast.  C’mon lets go for a drive.

“72 month financing, does not matter if your upside down in your current car. Here have a sandwich and we can get the paperwork done.”

“The new Škoda Cthulhu runs on economically sourced organic fuel, and will almost never require a virgin sacrifice.”

“Also, that car feels British to me.”

Guy in my neighborhood in his 80's no family owns a bunch of commercial property and spends a lot of his time yelling at people who park or drive on it without going to any of his businesses- during the pandemic he started building a wall of junk covering all the entrances until the city stopped him- he also yelled at…

From maybe the early 90s well into the 2000s he was most assuredly an A-lister, playing lead or major supporting roles in a string of high-profile popcorn movies that made (and paid him) big money.

Hun, she didn’t wrongly think she knew the owners. She was consciously lying as a flex to put a person of color in his place, never dreaming for a minute that she was speaking to the owner himself. 

I wish someone had consulted with me. I have plenty of master/slave alternatives: 😉

It’s three in the morning here in Australia. I’ll go with it being a perfectly suitable time for drinking.

Jesus Fucking Christ.

Dude I’m trying not to think about it. That shit is activating portions of my brain that’re definitely better left dormant. Also possibly melting my spine. Is it too early to start drinking?

Show the court on the teddy bear where California hurt you.

It really could be a lot worse...

Still better than Imagine Dragons.