I don’t think you know what communism or socialism actually mean. Sanders is, truly, party to neither of those ideas in full. Further, what does the qualifier “boring” have to do with the noun “liar?” Would you rather an exciting or entertaining liar who wages a global war and robs its constituency blind?

The path forward is clear.

You eat the lunch your wife packed at like 10 a.m. then still go get your burrito. Or eat the burrito and throw the lunch away and never mention it. But you don’t, under any circumstances, risk fucking that situation up, you moron.

“The less hair you have, the more head you get.” - My drunk uncle

I did. It sounds amazing and noisy. But to make you pedantic fucks happy.

So much better than a Tundra.

*Eats Lunch at Desk*

Come on, we all know Brady did that shit. If you don’t think he had anything to do with adjusting the PSI you are:

You’re part of the problem. Just another person illegally touching their balls.

Christmas came early.

Logitech M510.

Logitech M510.

In other words “let’s just wait until football season is over, ok guys”

Soon as I hit the fan comments section, I immediately skipped around and browsed to see if ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER had an entry again this year.

Fuck this noise, at this rate I’m going to sign up for whatever online package the KBO League has and revel in all of its bat pinwheeling and somersaulting, pop star pitching glory. I know our country was founded by Puritans, but the day we get out celebrated by a nation that thinks blaring megaphones is a realistic…

I read that. It was amusing. But I don’t need to see the forthcoming receipt for Drew’s nipple clamps.

Oh, honey. You are so, so, SO lucky to never had had that manager who would willingly flush you down a toilet to please an asshole customer who is throwing the right flavor of shitfit. Rules don’t matter. Manager’s word is law.

I'd go to more tennis matches if I could openly smoke weed there.

Whatever employee at Tesla designed this thing is clearly a big fan of Hentai

I’m glad there’s no video or audio clip or something in this article that shows people who may not have played the game what you’re talking about.