Ew. I don’t want to think about Ben Shapiro and “Hold me, touch me.”

What’s the difference between Mumford & Sons and the Country Bear Jamboree?

It’s hilarious that the Daily Wire thought they could get their audience into a movie starring a woman.

Why are we supposed to care about Pete Davidson? I never asked for any Pete Davidson. I can live without a Pete Davidson.

He was probably okay with missing his mother’s funeral. Half of these people’s problem is that their parents didn’t love them enough.

Meanwhile, Mel is working on Jesus 2: Electric Boogaloo, presumably featuring all-new antisemitism!

Ikea has gone into plumbing as of late.

I doubt congress will go more than a couple of days before someone grandstands and challenges his speakership. And since it only takes one now...

I know reading is hard, but Tim Burchett is not a Democrat.

My favorite thing this week was a quote from McCarthy a couple of days ago. “Now we’ve learned how to govern.” NOW you’ve learned? 

Of course he did. What a maroon.

Hahaha! Who voted for Trump as speaker?

There’s not a snowball’s chance in hell Walgreens would do it anyway. They’re the chain that allows pharmacists to refuse to prescribe birth control pills.

And yet I don’t remember a single journalist ever asking him. At least we could get a denial on record and maybe have the woman/women produce receipts like with Herschel Walker.

Is anyone else shocked that a guy who previously justified rape turned out to be a rapist?

Probably. People still go to see Louis CK.

I hate that I can’t listen to his old comedy records since they were so influential to my youth, but if I am not going to listen to him when he was in his prime, I’m sure as hell not going to listen to his old man rants.

“Ah, Mr. Santos. Once again we see there is nothing you can possess that I cannot take away.”

Exactly. What happened? I mean I guess what happened is she just lied, but how did she get away with that level of lying?

Can you please name me the condom brand that’s 100% effective and never breaks or leaks?