“none of the all-seeing crime-prevention devices happened to flag a man who brought 10 automatic weapons with him to the Strip.”

I mean, if I saw a ghost that was cut out of a sheet with pinking shears, I’d sure as hell run the other way. Course, I’d probably be high as balls, so there’s that. Not before I tried to eat her crinkle french fry hiking poles though.

All Day I Dream About Sanctions

Yuuuuuuup. The best thing he added to the season were a few outbursts of “Ball Don’t Lie”. One of those got him ejected 

Nuh-uh, all the Juggalos’d just pile into one dude’s car and escape

No they don’t, I just mean that it’s a bad idea in the U.S., even worse in a foreign country, which is why it’s surprising that no one at Netflix thought to take security seriously.

HeREEKiel SMELLSofIT - IT stands for “Intimidating (T)Clown”, because the clown lives in the sewers and eats children and quits on plays and lets down the whole great state of Texas by being a bad clown. That’s who you are, HeReekiel SmellsofIT, you’re a bad clown and I hope the discipline you get is Jason Garrett…

Right.. even if security blocked her at the door, she’s just going to be on the phone, screaming to every member of the family. You’d have to sit down with the family beforehand and let them know what you planned, and that if they answer the phone it’s their problem, and you don’t want to SEE them on the phone or hear…

“go shit in a hat” brb, stealing that for use in every conversation I have this weekend...

When my sister got married, one of her husband’s groomsmen asked if he and his wife could bring their infant (about 6 months old). They said no, no kids invited. He tried to make a case about not being able to separate the kid from his mother during breastfeeding. They said, sorry, then you won’t be able to be in the…

Yes, I feel like they are kind of stuck at this point since she knows all of the details already. They can either cancel the whole think and elope/do something else with fewer people, or just resign themselves to her being there and doing what she does.

You should have been the guest idiot speaker at the IDIOT CONVENTION.

We probably forgot...for reasons....

“Just shows me what they got over there.”

That’s nothing, the Giants hold a AAA outfield meeting every game.

Colin Kaepernick doesn’t have a job because he won’t stand.

I am sad that this is probably true.

If anyone is looking to get it on during the eclipse, I’m GGG.

Still Life With No Pecker

Whatever, Bugs Bunny struck out 3 goons with one pitch one time. #goat