Right.. even if security blocked her at the door, she’s just going to be on the phone, screaming to every member of the family. You’d have to sit down with the family beforehand and let them know what you planned, and that if they answer the phone it’s their problem, and you don’t want to SEE them on the phone or hear…

“go shit in a hat” brb, stealing that for use in every conversation I have this weekend...

When my sister got married, one of her husband’s groomsmen asked if he and his wife could bring their infant (about 6 months old). They said no, no kids invited. He tried to make a case about not being able to separate the kid from his mother during breastfeeding. They said, sorry, then you won’t be able to be in the…

Yes, I feel like they are kind of stuck at this point since she knows all of the details already. They can either cancel the whole think and elope/do something else with fewer people, or just resign themselves to her being there and doing what she does.

You should have been the guest idiot speaker at the IDIOT CONVENTION.

We probably forgot...for reasons....

“Just shows me what they got over there.”

That’s nothing, the Giants hold a AAA outfield meeting every game.

Colin Kaepernick doesn’t have a job because he won’t stand.

I am sad that this is probably true.

If anyone is looking to get it on during the eclipse, I’m GGG.

Still Life With No Pecker

Whatever, Bugs Bunny struck out 3 goons with one pitch one time. #goat

His HoF bust should have a pressure sensitive head that results in a hidden fist punching anyone that touches it.

I mean...I don’t want to judge (ok, I want to judge), but this sounds like kind of a failure of parenting to me. I’m not going to say that parents can prevent kids from liking what they’re going to like, but the fact that the kid is saying things like “you seem nice” and “I don’t know why everyone doesn’t like you”…

He had an answer for everything thrown at him, and over 13 draining rounds, he clinically beat Cooney up, bringing him further and further from land, reminding him constantly that he would eventually drown in a horrible way.

Really? You make a drug reference regarding how mellow Jamaica was and you pick Valium? JAMAICA?

That was amazing, just the absolute clumsiest transition I’ve ever read. But that’s the best thing about habitual liars: they wrongfully assume everyone believes their bullshit.

Mazzerotti Hoetell and Asston Martan Palla$$e are still at large

Dana White is to UFC press conferences what Puff Daddy was to Biggie videos.