And this is the guy planing your mission to mars.

True dat, but that doesn’t mean I don’t LOVE to hear it.

I can’t remember the last time I read it outside of a waiting room.

Two things about women:

white trash dairy.

and then she think’s YOU’RE the creepy one! 

He’s delivering pizzas not furniture.

I’m making a 1920s dairy cake!

Oh. ok.

When was the last time you read sports illustrated outside of a waiting room?

Oh gee, I just happened to drop my towell.

I’ll bet it really hurt when she started going out with him.

It’s marketing dude.

The easiest TV show to get on air, is a TV show about a TV show.

Sometimes it needs ketchup at the end, sometimes it doesn’t.

If they didn’t, they get drummed out of the club.

they said sober. I don’t recall anyone at the methadone clinic saying they needed to ‘sober up’.

Hello, Starbucks IT department?  How do I block a particular email?

This is not a movie.

besides, all meat is plant based. and natural.