Oh Ms. Woodley, it probably doesn’t seem like it’s a possibility now, but you should probably be prepared to be Thora Birch-ed into obscurity. I mean, Anna Paquin won a fucking Oscar and yet is best known for a tv show. Suck it up, buttercup. Fame ($$) is fleeting.

Or maybe you’re just a shitty person who blames others for your problems instead of taking responsibility for your life? Occams Razor and all that....

No.......you used a lot of words yet somehow you didn’t say anything at all.

Lea Michelle: SO THIRSTY.

Can we just call this article: Band No One has Heard of Does Video Remake No One was Asking for

Samantha Bee is a national treasure. Her show is incredible and her blazer collection is the blazer collection of my dreams.

Fuck you, 2016.

Dear Olivia Wilde,

It’s medical waste and should be disposed of as such. No one cremates their tonsils.

My dude is working on this and thinks its going to be hi-larious! Can’t wait!

“Mortons”

I just came here to bitch about Paris Hilton having the exact same hair style since the early aughts.

Please write this. Make it a column. This is the T-Swin fanfic the world needs right now.

Ive heard she has a cat named Kitty Purry. Which, if its true, is hands down the best thing she has ever done IMO.

Ohmygawd I want to hear more about the Tilda Swinton/ Lord of Darkness feud. That sounds amazing.

“Three white families with K last names annually vacationing together? I wonder what they called themselves in private?? HMMMMMM.”

Also, “I love to laugh.”

Re Ms. Heard’s costume fitting for Justice League: Actors get refit all the time. Seriously. Her costume probably went to alterations and they had to do a check-fit with her to make sure the alts were correct. Also, the time between the original fittings and when the costume *actually* works can be months. Thus:…

TILDA IS SLAYING.

Seriously? Then why the fuck were Bill Clinton, Magic Johnson & Kareem Abdul Jabar hanging out in my East LA neighborhood of El Sereno today pandering to the 97% Central American residents?