I know! I just hope he survives. Drew doesn’t have a great track record of helping defenseless creatures.

You need a healthy dose of 5th Element in there as well!

My son had teeth at 5 months, that wasn’t a reason to wean him. Their teeth don’t touch you. Also, all of my male sexual partners had a full set of teeth and I let most of them put my tits in their mouth too. Just saying.

My son is 16 months and still nursing. I’d like to go to two, that’s what the WHO recommends and I feel it’s a good age to go until for us. However, I am 5 months pregnant and my supply isn’t really very good right now, so we’ll see what happens. Most children will wean themselves by around 3.

My kid had teeth at 4 months. Teeth aren’t a problem unless the kid intentially bites. The physiology of breastfeeding means teeth don’t contact boob.

I don’t see how it would be anymore distracting than listening to the radio. Lots of people do this. They use a hands-free bra and attach and detach the pump while the car is parked.

[insert generic white, Fox New dudebro here]

I’m afraid that’s not sufficient. We’re going to need Spock for this job:

it’s like she’s even scared of the black guy via satellite!

The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration reports that airbags are useful in saving lives, but won’t work correctly if the person using the airbag is too close to the airbag (as the child would have been in his mother’s lap) or is unrestrained (ditto).

Sometimes (increasingly often) I fucking hate this country and its racist, sexist, classist, self-centered, Horatio-Algier-motherfucker-it’s-a-myth-believing, almost-all-entirely-born-of-immigrants-but-somehow-still-hating-other-immigrants-for-also-being-from-somewhere-else, hypocritical,…

Can we just add FOX NEWS to the list of hate groups?

Wait, she was a Survivor contestant? Like, that is how she got famous-ish? Oh my god. Oh my god that’s fucking hilarious.

I am writing this as my 15 month old with a full set of teeth nurses: it doesn't hurt. The tongue covers the bottom teeth and the top only just kind of touch down gently.

That’s what confuses me the most. That kid is old enough to wait (and chew steak). People can be such hillbillies.

I remember those days of screaming babies/kids when driving and it is awful, but YOU PULL OVER AND DEAL WITH IT. Or sing Moon Moon Moon on constant repeat until both you and the baby are brain dead.

And really, the old “well, I’ve done it before Officer and everything worked out fine” is the least good excuse ever. She’s lucky they can retroactively ticket her for those offenses too. Fool.

Listen, I’m all about multi-tasking, and I am totally cool with breastfeeding whenever and wherever. But I’m not OK about endangering children. Ever. WTF, lady?

Also: world’s most simple lyrics. He’s practically “yeah yeah, my dick gets big, then I put it in her vagina. Yeah. She’s a girl. I have a dick. I have sex with my dick.” Lyrical master indeed.

For a second I thought “this will seem so gross to her 10 years from now when she’s older/(hopefully)wiser and he’s just some idiot ex-boyfriend and she hears it on the radio.”