True. So, surely we can organize something similar for the others? Obviously Ted Cruz’s should involve having an extremely punchable face... Oh! Maybe we can make “Cruz” synonymous to having sex in a position that means you don’t have to look at your partner’s face because you would just want to punch it.

I will ride that bike (which will have a wicker basket on the front, into which I will place an adorable small animal, possibly a guinea pig) while wearing a glorious retro fit and flare dress of checked gingham. Because I do things properly.

Can I come visit? Do guests get rooms with a good view of the farmhands fields?

Bobby, Bobby, Bobby. No Patrick Stewart news is ever zzzzzzzzzzzzzz worthy. The man is entirely too adorable.

Yeah, I don’t think she won. She’s accusing admitted comic book nerds of liking comic book movies. BOLD. As a comic book nerd, my response to her final tweet is: I will enjoy it, thanks. And your point?

And really, NO PStew news is EVER zzzzzzzzzz. Sir Patrick is a living legend and entirely adorable.

What always cracked me up was how the kids who would invariably refuse a pacifier if it were offered (to the point of hurling it across the room with a force to make a superhero feel inadequate) would then tackle another child, put him in a sleeper hold, steal HIS pacifier, pop it in, and refuse to part with it. WUT.…

I am no longer married to a narcissistic drug addict. All is well.

Frankly, if a kid still has the need to suck (which, yup, totally developmentally normal) I would rather they used a pacifier than sticking EVERYTHING WITHIN REACH INTO THEIR MOUTHS OMG. If my years in childcare taught me anything, it is that kids who use pacifiers are not the ones eating the toys and making me…

Ugh, my eldest didn’t talk until he was 2 1/2 and I had so many people tell me that it was because of his pacifier. No, no, it wasn’t. He’s just one of those kids who talks late. He made up for it really quickly, too. REALLY quickly. Here is the timeline:

WHY ARE YOU JUDGING MY FAVORITE HOBBY!?

Kid #1 called it a “happy.” I’m pretty sure that’s just what “passie” sounds like when you’re two and you are trying to say it with one in your mouth, but “happy” it became and “happy” is what stuck. So when Kid #2 rolled around, we immediately started calling it his “happy.”

I kept telling them that I couldn’t understand them with it in their mouths, and whenever they would take it out and set it down I would grab it and stuff it in my purse. Out of sight, out of mind, and they just kept going longer and longer without them until they never even asked for them any more.

Donald needs to take some lessons. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ppuMaQ…

Very slowly

SHE TURNED ME INTO A NEWT

Evidently the rule was put in place last fall because of parent complaints.

The Daily Progress article says it was put in place last fall because of complaints from parents. What kinds of complaints? And how are those complaints anything but sexist?

Also, there’s a new clothing store next door to the Starbucks on 29, and they are doing 40% off in perpetuity. Their women’s stuff is blah, but they’ve got some nice men’s button-downs and polos. FYI. Got my eldest a nice DC backpack for $24 yesterday.