MY FRENZIED GAZE HAS DESTROYED COUNTLESS MILLIONS.

She was a wealthy man's daughter, but after his death she was basically the scullery maid. Maybe not technically a peasant, but the dress would have been similar. The menial labor comment stands. Dammit, I demand realism in my fairy tales!

Do you doubt the power of my frenzied gaze?

You will not regret it.

It really is the best book, isn't it? I buy it for every new parent I know. And the toddler book. They're awesome. I used to work in childcare, and I used the 5 Ss with the babies all the time and my success rate at getting them to sleep was sooooooo much higher than anyone else's.

Remember to factor in the fact that Tina probat insured hers in the 80s, so inflation, as well as celebrities being so much more celeb now. I still think that if Tina were at the top of her career now, with current celebrity adoration climate and dollar values of stuff, she could get much more than Taylor.

Yeah, that certainly doesn't help. Being so overt about your sexual prowess usually means that you've probably had sex once, in the back of your mom's town and country minivan, and it lasted exactly 3.63 seconds, and your partner told you how great it was while tweeting her girlfriends that it was the most annoying…

May I suggest that you anonymously leave this book in a cute little gift bag on your neighbor's doorstep? Seriously, it's magic.

Well, I, for one, would not only have REFUSED to see the movie, the sight of Cinderella with a naturally-sized waist would have probably caused me to black out and run riot through the streets, burning passersby with my frenzied gaze alone.

Didn't Tina insure hers for an amazing amount at some point? I mean, insuring legs sounds weird to us plebs, but I'm pretty sure that insuring various body parts for exorbitant amounts is normal for celebs. And it's not like they can just pull the numbers out of thin air. My guess is that if Tina were at the height…

I... just... I mean.... WHY? Why would this be something that someone would want to watch? Is this supposed to turn me on somehow? *shudder* blech.

True. Even better.

Please, please, someone add "Does not wear fishnets" to Piers' wikipedia page.

I feel that shade is too much of an art for flow-charts. One cannot create a great sonnet by flow-chart, One cannot create a master symphony by flow-chart. One cannot create a Picasso by flow-chart. If you need a flow chart, best to just admire the work of others.

M-O-O-N SPELLS OMG THE STAND IS ON NETFLIX FUCK THIS STUPID SLEEPING BEAUTY MOVIE I AM WATCHING THE STAND

Nah. It just doesn't speak to me. But if it's your best, rock on. Music is quite subjective. It's one of the things that make it great.

Single Ladies > Purple Rain > A toddler banging on pots > anything by Kid Rock, especially All Summer Long

They seem cool enough that I can ALMOST forgive the Scientology.

Probably. We can hope. That must be so odd for actors, who have to grow their hair out in possibly unflattering ways for parts, but then are expected to be out in public looking spectacular. ie, Tom Hanks' horrible haircut for da Vinci Code, wasn't it?

True, there is a bit of an issue there. Mostly, I'm probably just objecting to the beard because it is pretty much exactly what my ex has going on at the moment. And whenever I see my ex's beard, I it looks like there are bits of not-hair (fluff? food? leaves? squirrels?) stuck in it, and i think that it probably…