“And when under direct assault, the Bluegrass is able to retract the entirety of it’s head into it’s protective shell. This allows it to safely avoid danger while also enabling the turtle to rest comfortably inside its own asshole.”

I don’t know who that is, but he looks crazy smart. What a pair of glasses! I can only hope he’s in charge of securing our nuclear stockpile.

Blister on his hand sounds like the yanking happened before the game amirite

He said stain.

Ah, so the Bernie movement doesn’t exist, never did, and caused the downfall of the Democratic Party! This is an interesting theory and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

“The DCCC is who you can thank for the political might we have acquired over the past several decades”

In that the Democrats are at their lowest point since the end of the Reconstruction, this is entirely true. The loss of power and rise of people like Ryan, Bush, Cheney and Trump is fully on the Democratic…

So, you’re a big supporter of Clarence Thomas then?

People are not inherently more worthy of support than others because of their race, particularly in a primary, which is the stage in the electoral process where the people get to choose who they want to run in a general election based on the issues at play.

I agree. But Comey was not the one who leaked the letter to the press. Chaffetz did. Chaffetz also mischaracterized the Comey letter, making it look way worse than it was. Arguably, Comey’s mistake was in thinking he could write a letter to the intelligence committee and expect the republicans on it to maintain the…

Problem is they aren’t “takedowns,” it’s just petty bullshit that does nothing to undo the damage of installing Trump in the first place. Comey is bad.

Yeah, because there were SO MANY people on the fence about whether to vote for Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump, polar opposites of one another. Gimme a fuckin’ break. This was the last straw for potential Clinton voters??? For real???

We need a caption contest here. First prize, all expenses paid trip to Manhattan topped off with a Broadway show and dinner with Earther staff. I’ll start:

Being biased against conservatives benefits everyone.

It would be more of a lower spine handing since lizard people don’t have traditional asses.

No it’s not.

The original Player to be Named Later.

He wanted an even higher strikeout rate, but “Giancarlo Stanton” was already taken.

It’s hard to imagine what Lovullo could’ve said that would’ve been more offensive to Molina than to Timmons

This is all I see.

i can’t even be mad. i clicked into this article. i read it. i did this to me.