shellybean
shellybean
shellybean

That’s the kind of face you normally see after hundreds of years of aristocratic in-breeding. I’ve seen a plate of mashed potatoes with more distinction.

I know you meant this as a joke, but there legitimately is a Speedy Gonzalez movie in production ::sigh::

Looney Tunes. Jokes about rape, suicide, crossdressing, murder and race. My how the times have changed.

Drew Barrymore and Will Koelman are splitsville too (+ Joshua Jackson and Diane Kruger)! I feel the floodgates are open. There’s actually been a remarkable amount of feuds & splits.

She was bluffing with her muffin too much

It feels like the perfect time. So many other distracting news stories.

How many celebrities are going to announce their splits under the cover of the Kim/Kanye/Taylor cloud?

I have never, ever thought about this but you are completely right and now ‘bone broth’ is going to drive me insane! All broth is made from bones! Maybe it's supposed to be in contrast to broth made from bouillon cubes or something?

What the hell is bone broth if not just regular broth that specifically has meat?

you know, cus men are so involved with tampons! They can’t get enough of talking about ‘em!

“I can’t work on my moon”

I wish I could just decide to not have a job anymore!!!

The whole section on periods is unreal.

goddamnit if this weren’t so completely insufferable white woman bullshit it would be completely my jam

This is a gathering for women who have aged out of Coachella.

You can pry my dry shampoo from my cold dead lazy shower hating hands.

Meh. Saying something ugly and regrettable in the heat of the moment kind of pales in comparison to murdering your children.

Off topic:

oh, see, i liked the skorts. ours were flat front and didn’t look like skorts, just had the built in shorts on the inside.