If this gomer pyle looking badass can fight nazis, so can I. <3 my grandpa.

I bet when you posted your comment you didn’t expect expert anonymous internet commenters to go on a series of rants about who the funniest five people might be and why they know comedy better than you OR Melissa McCarthy.

Has anyone else tried snail moisturizers? I’ve been liberally smearing snail goop on my face for a month now and It. Is. Awesome. Ill never have perfect skin because I’m an inflammatory mess but things have been way better with snail goop.

My husband’s best friend Tom is travelling for business. He was in southern Alabama last night, and he had dinner at the bar of the restaurant next-door to his hotel. Some yokel came up to him and told him he shouldn’t be drinking his Bud light because Anheuser Busch supports immigration. Tom calmly told the defective…

I haven’t seen a single fucking reason she should have even been nominated

Rossellini is an A+.

Yeah, but the amazing thing about America is that we all have the opportunity to work ourselves to damn death and then be reborn as the offspring of someone really really famous for being beautiful
#bootstraps

By crook they mean woman. She’s a woman who had the audacity to spend years in politics, be intelligent and wealthy. When a dude does it he’s a genius! It’s commendable! A woman who becomes successful though... Clearly a witch.

It’s insane. Hillary was certainly a flawed candidate, but she was also qualified and didn’t deserve the amount of criticism that she faced. Some people harbored an irrational hatred of her, and I think a lot of it had to do with her gender.

Nope. They get to eat at the shit-dinner buffet too as guests of honor. Herr Asshat made zero excuses for his bullshit. From his first words where he called Mexicans rapists, that was it. The only way you could even begin to justify it is if he had profusely apologized and backtracked completely. Did he? No, he…

Extra! Extra!

My new position is that Democrats should just leave the capitol building and refuse to participate in government for the next two years. All we ever seem to do is shave the most heinous parts off of Republican policies and then get blamed for the predictably shitty results by a bunch of know-nothing hicks. If,…

His supporters still think trickle down economics is brilliant. They’ll cheer on this change. Because of the billionaires just get richer, maybe one day I’ll make some money too! And let’s not forget they’re JOB CREATORS. even though most of them don’t believe in minimum wage period. Maybe jobs will come back but…

Surprising no one, he’s full of shit. His buddies probably can’t loans because they are a bad credit risk. Just like his OWN COMPANY.

Viktor Petrenko (I began to realize somethings around this time...)

Surya Bonaly. She did a fucking backflip, so they banned them.

Amy Schumer

Team Kristy Yamaguchi all the way forever.

Kristi Yamaguchi > Tonya > Nancy