The other day I had a brief question in my mind about how old Queen Elizabeth is, and after reading her entire Wikipedia biography, found myself dropping down a rabbit hole of British heraldry, insignias, royal houses, royal succession, ad infinitum. I learned how just about anyone with a royal title in Europe is…

Welll...I mean, “elite” is a good thing. It means the best of the best, the cream of the crop. I’m never offended when conservatives call me elite; I’m just glad they recognize that I truly am better than they are.

“A majority does not have to be 50.1% you know.”

I turn the cell phone data off if the kid starts creeping over 3GB. I wasn’t watching one month, and she got in a whole 12GB. Thank Crom for roll-over data. And most wifi routers have dual channels. I give the kid the password to one, and have everything else run off the second. Then when she’s being a brat and…

Why are we equating “everyday Americans” with specifically “rural” America.

The vast majority of people live in urban areas/cities. The vast majority of the middle class live in urban-surburban areas/cities. Most colleges and universities are in urban areas/cities. The major areas of growth in the nation are in urban…

Your parents in 1996: “Don’t talk to strangers, honey. They might have bad intentions”

What if your nephew was like, “I’m not sure I’m even gonna vote. These people are both bad” on election day. But then the day after the election he wrote a blog on deadspin about how we’re all fucked because Trump won? What should I say to this specific type of shithead nephew?

But I’m so glad we didn’t elect a lady who doesn’t know how to email well.

NO I WON’T STOP SAYING IT.

I voted for Hillary Clinton.

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

My conservative cousin wholeheartedly believes Trump will win “in a landslide” because a poll on some right-wing website says so. ... She’s going to be very, very disappointed.

Guys I hate to bring down the mood but this is some serious shit that Jez needs to be reporting.

Trevor Noah nailed this one perfectly: there is a massive difference between using obscene language to talk about your totally consensual sexual experiences and talking about sexually assaulting someone. Is the first one kinda shitty, depending on the situation? Yea. Do your friends probably want you to shut up…

The goal isn’t the chip away at the voters he DEFINITELY has. It’s to take the voters who were considering him, and make them so disgusted an uninspired that they stay home. While also simultaneously taking any on-the-fence independents/democrat-leaning voters, and them them so disgusted that they’re motivated to go…

You might even say, they need to carry this to term.

AAAARGH - I heard that same interview, and that Tucson woman was just... horrible. She went on about how TOUGH she was, she used to work at a STEEL MILL! (...as a secretary. It’s tough work, doing the same clerical work that other secretaries do - BUT AT A STEEL MILL!) Then she went on about Hillary Clinton “flirting”…

No, really. He’s known as the soda/pop commie because it’s the right of mericuns to buy 100 oz cups of sugarbeetus juice if they want

If my FB feed (which, admittedly, loses at least a couple people a day now) is any indication, they will vehemently defend Trump choice of words and tell you how Hillary Clinton wants to eat every soldiers first born child.

Libertarianism is the ideology of mental children who drive to work on government-provided roads, who eat food and water the government has mandated not contain human thumbs, who get their latest toys through government-provided postal services, who learned everything they knew in government-mandated schools, and…

Yeah, but you see, Hillary had a private server where she stored her emails. So.