I became a naturalized US citizen over five years ago, although I’ve lived here for over twenty. However, my sister has pushed it off for years and years because it’s expensive and she doesn’t have a lot of money. First thing I did on Wednesday was tell her to send in her application ASAP and that I would help her…

“What a load of garbage!”

Yes, Joe, just like the fact that you’ve been reelected so many times. Finally, you’re getting what you deserve.

He’s saying those votes are “ignored” in that the people who voted for the loser, even if they make up 49.9999% of the population and/or millions and millions, gets no representation afterwards.

omg I love you

I absolutely adore Sam Bee, she’s probably the only positive thing to come out of this dumpster fire election cycle. I usually watch her episodes twice because on one viewing, I’m laughing hysterically, and the other, I’m usually in tears because our world is currently so heinous.

Definitely. It’s really sad that we’re not hearing more about that; the focus tends to be on why people are supporting Trump despite his “qualities” (which is also an interesting story). On NPR’s Morning Edition earlier today they had a woman on the phone from Arizona going on and on about Islamic terrorists and then…

It’s literally exhausting trying to prove your points to others. When I say Trump has been proven to lie more frequently than others and point to fact-checker sites where that information is compiled, I usually get the response of “those are known liberal sites.” But of course, Fox News is absolutely golden. It’s…

Most voters are just so unable to view the candidates from any other viewpoint than their own. This is why incumbents can either be golden or totally FUBAR. Currently, people (especially white people) are realizing that there are systemic failures that are screwing them over on the reg. Their next logical conclusion…

I know why your parents don’t like her.

Anyone who says they dislike her but “can’t put a finger on why” - it’s because she’s a woman.

This is how I feel when people tell me either A) they’re voting for Johnson or Stein because third party revolution/change the system/blah blah reasons, or B) they’re just not sure who they’re going to vote with because “I mean Trump is bad, but Hillary has that email scandal soooooo...”

It’s the feeling of someone who…

Nope, you’re a terrible human. In a majority of places, it’s illegal to ride a bike on the sidewalk. So we HAVE to ride on roads with scary entitled little assholes like you who think they shouldn’t belong even though bike lanes are a thing.

“Bikes can’t go as fast as cars so GTFO” is probably THE worst argument from…

Yeah, fuck this logic. First off, it’s not necessarily binary - I drive more than I bike, but I still consider myself a “bicyclist.” Maybe you should avoid that“me versus them” mentality. And in my experience, drivers are way more distracted and less perceptive of things around them. I always ride in a designated bike…

Runners need to be way higher, they talk about #runnerproblems alllll the time, from having to poop on runs to having gross battered toenails and are always talking about their “runner’s high” UGH.

You can still have pockets! Regular shorts generally have four (!) pockets!

Okay, but would he say the same thing about you if you only wore sweatpants everywhere?

Cargo shorts are terrible. Mainly for the length (they tend to go past the knee and make men look weirdly short, but those same men tend to think “gay” when shorts only go halfway down the thigh) but also for the amount of pockets.

My family in the UK calls it “streaky bacon”
I think their bacon is better anyway

Nooooo shorts should always be shorter than knee length. Ugh. Otherwise you’re basically wearing capris. Or cargo shorts.

Show a little thigh. It’s okay.

Different strokes, I guess, because, except for John Oliver, Lena Headey, and Peter Dinklage, I would literally pick the exact opposite of your picks.

THE AMERICANS YASSSS.

Best show on TV by miles. Finally an Emmy nom for Best Drama, and both lead actors too!

This is super topical right now because my favorite local “artisan” sandwich place down the street just scrapped their entire lunch menu and now one of the only items on the (lunch) menu is avocado toast. For thirteen (!) dollars. Um no, I can make that shit at home for literally pennies. Stop trying to make this some…