Yeah, haha, the river caught fire, and your water is undrinkable...what’s truly staggering is that this is a punchline to most people, not a deadly serious issue that affects all of us. The blind greed of corporations and their willingness to buy off our elected representatives (and their willingness to be bought)…

They let you copy music from LPs or other cassettes (though of course the quality sucked more with every generation) and they made it possible to listen to your music on a portable system. They suck compared to what came after but cassettes were a great thing in their day.

Right? Like a chain of 20 was amazing.

The truest expressions of buttness tend to happen when one meaty cheek meets another, combining to form one giant Voltron ass with a stink that envelopes the whole game.

“Almost every” is not “every,” and you don’t notice just how vast that difference is until you need to use one.

Mr. Mom came out 35 years ago, c’mon people.

Life on the east coast has never been better since he took over. Streets are cleaner, full employment, all hobos replaced by mailboxes. And no one is currently pointing a flamethrower at me and forcing me to write this glowing post about God-King Scoropio’s benevolent rule, either.

the motley crew of Gremlins in Gremlins 2. Contrasted to the first one where they wreak havoc on a local town, the fact that they spend the duration of the sequel causing chaos in a corporate tower at the expense of a Trump-like CEO puts them in my good books

Also Brain Gremlin may be one of my favorite concocted creat…

The Amazing Mr. No Legs in The Amazing Mr. No Legs (he’s the villain AND the star, and who wouldn’t root for him?)

I maintain that the airplane rescue is the finest Superman setpiece we’ve ever had. But the rest of the movie really is a snooze fest, if occasionally fun.

Fuck all of you for making me realize I’m a Phil Collins fan.

I’d buy that for a dollar!

While I still love the Age of Apocalypse part of me wonders if it’s partially responsible for what I see as a glut of current Marvel writers showing more interest in creating alternate universe/timeline/dimension versions of current characters, and playing around with them, rather than trying to do something…

Shake it before you bake it. 

Not really the same thing, but the Airplane reference reminded me of the time at my first job when they had received a fax (yes, it was that long ago) that had been garbled in transmission. I walked into the office and the manager pulled it off the fax machine, handed it to me, and said, “What can you make of this?”

Also Naked Lunch: “I can think of at least two things wrong with that title.”

It looks like an N64 version of a beard. 

Based on Kelsi's Instagram, she finds Chlamydia kinda catchy.

“Fever Itch”