Yeah, I'm struggling to find something cynical to say here. Maybe I could go with that old Internet standby of saying "Yeah, because…" and then making ab inane straw man statement that zero people were arguing for.

GREAT ENDING FOR DEXTER. EXACTLY WHAT I WOULD HAVE DONE. RAD!

"What's that? Scandal you say? With Russia? I had no idea! I've just been sitting here quietly reading my Bible and not talking to anybody!"

Sam's just afraid Trump's part-time job as a TV and pop culture critic will gradually blossom into a full time career that's so successful it puts all of Sam's work to shame.

That's true. In some movies the villain shoot a purple laser into the sky instead of a blue one before being defeated with the power of teamwork.

"Superhero movies are a unique and diverse genre" is pretty thin ice to build a city on.

Back in 2012 I went on Trump's Twitter feed, which even then was nothing but the entire universe calling him God's Worst Accident. Every single comment insulted him, and so replied to every single coment.

Not with that hair.

Does anyone else feel like Trump's secondary career as a TV critic might be the single least Presidential thing about him? All the other stuff—the bigotry, the lack of respect for the rule of law, the utter inability to understand the Presidency is a job and not a gift—are at least tangentially related to politics.…

I am struggling to remember a single thing from that movie aside from "Andrew Garfield looks like a gay porn star, not a nerd" and "oh wait, he stuttered a couple times and owns an Xbox. Nevermind, this is exactly what nerds are like."

Eventually the reboots pile up so quickly multiple actors playing Uncle Ben all live together in the same house and sit around wondering which one will get shot next.

Sorry, I should've said "People who know when they're watching the same film dozens of times got sick of them 8 years ago."

Probably because we all got fucking sick of them 8 years ago.

Peter watches Uncle Ben die. 48 hours later a new Uncle Ben is in Peter's house. No one says anything. They all know better than to question it by now.

Uncle Ben shows up just long enough to scream "I FEEL IT. EVERY TIME. I WAKE UP. I KNOW IT'S COMING. I CANNOT DIE. PLEASE. LET ME REST." Then he aggressively stalks dark alleyways looking for muggers, grabs the gun from their holster, jams the barrel in his mouth, and shrieks "DO IT YOU PUSSY."

Only Donald Trump could make a New Yorker cartoon funny.

15 years later, Doc Hammer announces the first two episodes of Season 6 of Venture Bros will be ready any month now

One of my favorite myths about show business is that it is both a perfectly run machine controlled effortlessly by the Hollywood Illuminati, who know all and forsee all years in advance, and a shambolic mess where multimillion dollar deals are constantly evaporating over a mild criticism on Twitter.

"Earlier today I promised you grisly details regarding my firing and here they are:

Oh don't worry, he also exposed me to about 4,000 additional hours of men wearing fanciful costumes involving feathers and sequins. It's all sort of a blur of guys in costumes, people getting very excited by those costumes, and dad not understanding why I wasn't clapping and cheering the entire time, which he…