I just constantly dump pig's blood on my cock everywhere I go and I have a nonstop erection, but correlation doesn't equal causation so YMMV

skeletons can't get boners. it's an urban legend. maybe try reading ohhh I dunno A BOOK once or twice?? and educate you'reself?

I get sexually aroused by women (NO BLACKS OR ASIANS: POLYNESIANS OK) stomping on balloons coated in toothpaste. What day do I get?

^^^every human interaction I have ever had

Okay, wow. Pull up a chair. So, the first couple seasons of Dexter were amazing, right? And everyone was super pumped for Season 5, but then they changed showrunners and….

let me explain all the ways your political correctness is imperionormative: fart.

If you truly care about autistic people, Christian Weston Chandler is in dire need of like $750 a month for the rest of his life so he can run a media empire based on his yellow Sonic the Hedghog with non-blue arms.

In your heart, you know the nonstop praise inexplicably showered upon Beyonce is weird and unsettling and North Korean.

I am an alcoholic that will literally have a seizure if I don't drink throughout the day. I am constantly measuring every waking moment of my horrible fucking nightmare of a life by whether or not I have enough alcohol in my system to not fall over and convulse. I have a scar on my right wrist because, in a moment of…

ok hold on ignore my last couple posts because this is important, internet.(!)

see I didn't know which joke to go with so I just made two posts.

You're Getting Awfully Defensive, Internet!

This Was Competently Edited On A Technical Level But Thematically Incoherent, Internet!

also why are all these ads on the av club acting like melissa mccarthy died

wait wait wait

SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING

oh look deranged serial killers don't give two shits what Beyonce says

I'm so glad Beyonce, God's second-greatest creation behind Kim Jong-Un, is finally weighing in on this highly controversial debate as to whether or not crazed murderers should be allowed to shoot everyone with guns for no reason.

But are we getting the fun, friendly 0 AD Jesus, or the gritty, violent 2016 Jesus that knocks over buildings and snapped General Zodd's neck?

Just so you know, my Like isn't for your comment, but the general sentiment of giving the police godlike authority over life and death.