My parrot started imitating her moaning as she was going down on me. She starts laughing uncontrollably and I never got to finish. 

Those are my daughters and my mom in the video. Thank you for pouring positivity into my girls. All of this has turned a horrific experience into a great life lesson and a host of blessings!

Much more appropriate to have Dan Quayle get thrown under that thing.

that’d take her right out. i just had the bone and cat scans come back clear and i did a happy dance. an honest to god, literal, happy dance.

At least you can just reuse the name “bay of pigs”.

many of her friends went on to be “entrepreneurs, scientists, [and] architects.” ......we were 18 years old, going to school and launching careers,” she told the Times. “And it was fun.”

This man is the reason I took delivery of a Black on Black Trans Am with the requisite T-Tops 2 weeks after college graduation. RIP, Bert.

My pet peeve is unique. I mean it’s misuse of the word unique. Unique doesn’t mean rare, it means only. There is no superlative for unique. Nothing is very unique, or extremely unique, or the most unique. Nothing is almost unique either. If something were almost unique, it would be rare.

Why is rasberry flavor almost always unaturally blue?

Their quality was pretty amazing 20+ years ago but fast fashion kind of blindsided them and they adapted very poorly.

I’m going to address your questions here:

Our president is an idiot.

I wonder though: after this beating did Tim Hildebrand feel like he learned a lesson? Did he say to himself: I was wrong. Did he think: It was me against the world. And I was sure that I’d win. But the world pushed back and punished me for my sins? I mean, Mike did try to warn him of his evil ways. But I guess Tim…

On this, we disagree. However, I’m going to base my stance on fact rather than emotion.

Well, commies are okay now, it turns out, so long as they support the NRA. 

why wasn’t she looking at the flag while the anthem was playing? i was always taught to stare at the flag until the anthem was over, even if my eyes watered. never avert your gaze from that holy cloth because it holds supernatural powers that fill our hears with patriotism and love of country but hate of the people in…

I learned about body positivity from Jezebel via Lindy West years ago - I’d been fat my entire life and had always thought that the only way that I could be successful (at love/career/family/life) was by losing weight.  I started down the path to self-love/acceptance here through articles on this dumb website and now, …

I really miss Patrick Smith writing about aviation on Salon. This reminds me of him, and makes me sad.

I loaned out The Grounding of Group 6 in eighth grade and didn’t get it back for MONTHS—people kept passing it on—and when I finally did the front cover was torn off!

The Hillary defense is funny as it never says our president elect isn’t a moron, just that ‘yours was too!’ It’s like if you put a finish line at the end of the cliff and shouted “I’m winning” as you cross it at full speed.