This is obviously going to be the new set of a Running Man/Hunger Game style game show where the uninsured get parachuted in and have an all out battle to the death and the lone survivor gets healthcare.

When they got tired of their parents, they rectum.

I do find him opposable.

Hannity is back on the Seth Rich story for fuck's sake.

"but in a meeting with the investigative unit on Monday, the higher-ups said the facts of the story weren’t necessarily wrong"

It will not be released while it's under an audit.

That's exactly what I did.

A couple I know with a nice secluded pool went away for the weekend and told me I could use their pool if I took care of their dogs. So I decided to get really high and go skinny dipping.
Then one of the dogs found a giant rat and killed it and left it for me as a present in the middle of the yard
So I went from…

If I can't use the word moist, how else am I supposed to describe the current status of my taint in the summer to random passerbys?

No, it's news ire. The new category for Trump related stories.

I can sort of pull off Farrah nipples. Hold on while I turn up the AC.

Sand!
Uhh…..I don't like sand
Yes and?
It's coarse.
Yes and?
It's rough and irritating
Yes and?
It gets everywhere.

God damn it! Was typing something similar when you beat me to it.

Yes, and it would be considered a french toast.

Mitch McConnell as the turtle guardian of the beam.

Wasn't governor of Texas more of a ceremonial job? Did that change since W?

He's destroyed all norms in the Senate. I don't see us ever restoring them in this lifetime.

*no minorities allowed

This really hurt Trump. The only time he ever empathized with someone else was when he saw Edward Scissorhand's desire to have real human hands.

This is what I imagine goes on in Trump's head 24 hours a day.