I’m sure Trump has paid for abortions in his life. (Great abortions. The best abortions.)

Yep. Honestly in that clip, she sounded like my dad, who is about her age and is also relatively privileged. (Though obviously not on Jenner’s scale.) The difference is, nobody expects my dad to be progressive on gender issues.

No problem! I was an obsessive OC fan way back when, and celebrity real name trivia is among my areas of expertise.

Schenkkan is McKenzie’s birth name. I can see why he dropped it.

I don’t think it’s a question of intelligence; I think it’s one of caring. She will never need an abortion or social welfare benefits, so in her mind those issues are unimportant. It’s like when I hear about how tax plans affect people with a lot of investment income — that’s not me and it’s never going to be me, so…

I love how her friends all have these “oh my god please SHUT UP” looks on their faces. (Is it true they were paid to appear on the show? Because I can’t imagine any self-respecting woman, trans or cis, voluntarily hanging out with somebody who said things like that.)

Sometimes something that’s small on its own is that one thing too many. This is a 17-year-old girl, she’s pregnant, she’s secretly married, she can’t tell her school about either thing — and on top of all the grown-up stuff she’s dealing with, her teacher is bitching her out and ordering her around over forgetting her…

It’s almost like bad things happen to most movie characters.

Sorry, I read past that in my outrage. I think people like her probably oppose restrictions on gun storage anyhow (and obviously she wasn’t applying any), but that’s just speculation. I hope this whole thing teaches her family to be more safety-conscious about their weapons.

Stay with me here ... maybe the reason Beyonce never says anyting interesting in interviews is that she’s not a terribly interesting person. You can be attractive and smart and talented and still not have much to say to people you don’t know well, and I think that’s Bey.

Eyes. I can get antibiotics for an eye infection, but I don’t think I’d ever get over the taste of shit in my mouth.

Oh my god, horseshoe theory in action. White people should only talk about white culture, only Native Americans should draw on Native traditions, and so on and so on. And hey, why don’t we just have separate restaurants and places to sit on the bus to avoid cross-contamination, that went well last time.

Typical. It bugs me how gun rights people are always talking about “it takes a good guy with a gun to stop a bad guy with gun” and “if guns become criminal, only criminals will have guns” and so on.

It’s funny — last time I saw my stylist, we were talking about Horrible Haircuts of Our Youth and I asked her whether she ever still gave perms.

I had no idea they were a thing until this series came out. But I was 16/17 for the trial, and basically if something wasn’t covered on MTV News I had no idea it was even happening.

That article was hysterical, if very TL;DR. You don’t see the point of bay leaves, fine! Don’t put them in things! You don’t have to! But the way the writer kept calling chefs hoping somebody would agree with her thesis ... I dunno, I kind of love doomed missions to prove things that are obviously wrong.

First, she censored it to about the level of a sexy ad. Do you also feel attacked every time you see a Calvin Klein billboard?

I understand what you’re saying, but seriously, who cares? It’s her body. Whether she wants to cover herself in head-to-toe burlap sacks or walk naked through Times Square at high noon, or whatever else she wants to do with it, she gets to decide. And if what you’re worried about is the cry for attention, isn’t…

Yeah, it sounds like literally anybody who’s 16 and armed with a MySpace/Facebook/Livejournal/whatever. If anything she gets points for using mostly correct spelling and grammar, and for not posting any spectacularly ill-informed political opinions.

Oh, my love for black people is very genuine! I have black friends and everything! They’re so good at sports and entertainment!