Apply nacho cheese and garlic fries to your body, attract all of the late game seagulls to your person...SEAGULL SNUGGIE OF WARMTH.

They did it that way in Chicago, too - I assume it’s an older standard, since they didn’t do it to the two LA teams.

The coldest winter I ever spent was a daytime summer baseball game at Candlestick Park.

Presumably this means the average game-time temperature for Texas day games is much higher than 84.3, and the average game-time temp for SF night games is 5 below zero.

Huh. Could have sworn Cleveland was perpetually 66.6.

This took me entirely too long to make.

Based on how quickly Mr Met flipped out the bird he’s either been practicing this move, or has done it before without getting filmed.

In defense of white shirt kid, his initial glee at witnessing the meltdown fades at the end and he abruptly recognized the utter emptiness of his initial joy in light of the impotence apparent in Kyrgios’ sad rage. I actually think he grew as a person there.

Next time I break down in tears, my only wish is for someone to come stand over me with an umbrella.

Unfortunately, this will only be the second most devastating withdrawal from Paris today.

#1 is refried beans made with honest-to-goodness real LARD by someone’s abuelita or tia.

1. Grizzly

+45

Q: What’s the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?

The weird thing is if you ranked the 100 best jellybeans being hit by a truck would probably come in at #50.

Places I play at, most greens are sloped from back to front, so going long on the approach will result in a tougher chip or pitch back down. (Any course that slopes greens from front to back was designed by a real asshole.)

Recommending blades for a beginning golfer is like the equivalent of telling a writer they need to use a manual typewriter to, I don’t know... feel the exquisite pleasure of a well struck key.

No, do not wear jeans, or gym shorts, or a t-shirt. Rummage through your dresser and find your one Polo and pair of khakis, you effing slob.

“hitting it long (which you probably won’t do anyway) usually carries the same penalty as hitting it short, so give yourself a chance to actually get there.”