“There’s not a whole lot of perks that come with this job.”

Here’s my current cop beef. There are good cops and bad cops, just like any other profession. The difference between them and other professions is the need to defend rather than disavow the bad ones. I’m a teacher and my first thought when I hear about something horrible a teacher did is that they have disgraced the…

UGH.

I find it easier to pet kittens with my hands, but if you like to rub them with a philosopher more power to you; I just find them so unwieldy.

I mean, breaking it into two twelve hour halfs seems pretty arbitrary and I’m sure there is a story there. Why not record the passage of time with the decimal system and have ten hours a day?

On the flip side, one of my favorite internet encounters was on an article with tips for how to deal with problems that crop up in marriage/relationships, and some dope was in the comments saying, “I don’t understand why other people can’t make it work. Marriage is so easy! I met my true love, we got engaged after a…

Preach. Together for 10 years, married for a little over two. Broke up because he had a wandering dick that I honestly had (genuinely) no idea about. I KNOW judgey assholes were speculating about what a cold shrew I must have been, and that in some cases, he fed that line of thinking. And though it’s been a couple of…

I also think people assume “we’ve been together 10 years we should break up or get married” and realize they made the wrong choice.

I was one of these, I was with my dude for 7 years, live together etc, and we were married for about 2 years.

You are not wrong. This kind of thing has been going on forever, without the photographs and filming, obviously. But none of us in Los Angeles or New York ever heard about places like Maryville, Missouri. Heck, we rarely heard about the vicious teen rapes in small-town California and New York, and every state…

Bush Sr said it in full voice to 40 people. When you tell a large room full of non-relatives a thing, it’s not a secret. Jeb deciding what his father, who appears to be of quite sound mind and chose to announce this, really meant is condescending and pretty assy.

That probability only works out if you’re assuming that Presidents are randomly selected, surely.

No one’s as irrationally confident in their looks as fat white dudes. Like, they’re always the loudest critics of other people’s looks, particularly women’s.

Did he really say that, or is this a joke? At this point I can’t tell anymore.

I loved watching Trump tie himself into a Gordian knot trying to explain his stances on his tax returns, support for the Iraq war, and birtherism.

whatever Hillary’s meditation regime is, I want to take it up immediately. goddamn.

Who’s more sensitive, someone who experiences emotional distress at discussions of sexual assault, or someone who experiences emotional distress over a sign warning people who might feel emotional distress at discussions of sexual assault?

Um...no, this will never happen to me because I’m not a hoarder.

“walla”

You guys...this scares me in a special way because my parents are hoarders. They are not up to the garbage stage yet, but I see it only getting worse as they get older. My dad is 73 and my mom is 68. They shut any discussion about the state of their home down. When I tried to bring up the possibility of professional…