Maybe they’ll kill off Gordon with some kind of easily transmissible airborne virus.

As a nonbinary person, sincerely, fuck you Joan. You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about and it’s disgusting how blatantly phobic and hateful you are. 

It was so freeing when I learned that I could listen to music without requiring that the artists pass some arbitrary authenticity test.

When they sign the bill, can we get Obama to wander into the background and mutter, “This is a big fucking deal”?

He should have called...

Seagulls, stop it now!

I don't know her.

(Hmm... I think I wrongly dismissed this but maybe I can undismiss it by replying to it? Dang it, nope. Sorry.)

Ten #BlackVoicesforTrump sitting in a line

Maybe they can settle out of court and bury the story. 

Clearly, he did not think Mitch was turtle-y enough for the Turtle Club

“Have merci.”

Holy shit, is that true?! I also thought it was insane for the goalposts to be in the middle of the fucking field, but it’s even more insane that there are recurring INJURIES because of them and they won’t move them! What???

The Pacific Ocean called, it wants its salt back.

“Rando poster tries to make their comment thread bones by shit-posting Jon Stewart’s continued support of 9/11 First Responders.” would have been a good one too.

You know, your post is almost just fine, until you really crash and burn at the end.

Same. And if rethinking and then weakly roasting a feminist icon because your husband might think she’s lame isn’t ironic, I don’t know what is. Or is  it? Isn’t it ironic? Lemme go ask my husband. 

Heh. Misery demands company.

I feel like 400,000 residents of Halifax rose as one to yell to Johnny Weir “He’s from fucking Cole Harbour, buddy”

Knew a girl in middle school, Heaven Lee Gardener. Also a commune baby lol