The night vision goggles you got with the deluxe edition of “Call of Duty: Modern Warfare” were nicer than anything we checked out of the armory. Mainly I remember not being able to see anything the time I tried to use my NV goggles in training, and they were a hassle you had to carry around in country (serialized…

Threatening nuclear war didn’t meet Twitter’s list of bannable offenses, dropping another state secret won’t do it.  

Eh, special operations guys kinda do whatever the fuck they feel like, especially in country. The fact that 1) none of these guys have beards, and 2) they’re wearing regular issue gear, makes me think that this is a stateside Airsoft team in a staged photo-op until I hear otherwise.

Even if I was a hateful, bigoted wretch who loved the destruction Trump causes, I would still hate him for being so god damnably stupid.

I’m worried that he’s going to get blurred by history the way some of the 19th Century Presidents have. “Sure, some of them might have been awful, but nothing too remarkable happened in those decades and who remembers Teapot Dome, anyway?”

Somebody played the trailer today at work because there wasn’t much going on, and my takeaway was “Wow, it looks like they spent WAAAYYY more money on sets and costumes than ‘let these two futz around in front of a camera’ deserves.” This type of humor seems best suited to filming with a handheld camera and cheap sets…

He doesn’t even remember which foot it was for.

Just have it in Greece, and have everyone chip in to keep them afloat. 

I see a certain nihilistic self-interest I’m boomers that might be the result of growing up knowing that you could be senselessly vaporized at any moment.

Yeah, and that looming specter of death seems to have really fucked boomers up. 

I suppose someone bid $10k just for charity, and didn’t flip those meals and sell them right back in a transaction between private parties, right?  Hell, what was the menu at Mar a Lago that week?

Don’t reply to the novelty troll accounts, dude. 

Over, under, or through? 

Yes. There was a 2016 article where all of the GMG writers said who they would vote for, and at least one of the writers came down with “It doesn’t matter, I’m a straight white man, I’ll be fine.” Certain commenters have been furious about it ever since, so when Nick wrote his “Some millennials won’t vote because it’s…

I really don’t care how he dies as long as his corpse isn’t moved an inch. He dies on the sidewalk? We just leave him there, rotting and unloved, to be stepped around by people passing by.  

Ouch, Stig. 😂

Well, when your website puts ambiguously “satirical” content next to sarcastic actual content next to flat out boneheaded nonsense you’re going to have ridiculous arguments from people who don’t get that this particular article is a joke. I remember the cat article, and it wasn’t clear to me that the author was…

I never used to read the grays, and I didn’t realize how persistent some of them were with their novelty trolling accounts. Thanks for that, Splinter. 

I fully expected Nick’s “Voting is for Suckers” and its follow up “If you were as smart as me you’d be above voting” articles to make the list. 

Man, “has fled the country” is not a good look for a Cabinet member during a shutdown/Constitutional crisis/market crash, you know?