WHOOSH!

Thus take TheLoveSongOfJAlfredPress

Peak Manningface!!!

That was quite the blitzkrieg.

Stanford University replied, in a written statement:

“What a tough pill to swallow... But it goes down easy with an ice cold Budweiser!!!!”

I’m proud to say that I Googled “birthalingus” and only one document — this very post — came up. Perhaps there is hope for the species after all.

FUCK.

I kicked in college. Kicking the laces is a nightmare because it’s hard and uneven. That said, it’s doable to sort of knuckle it through from only 27 yards. Walsh isn't off the hook here, but the holder should carry most of the blame.

...since I judged a beauty pageant for him, which was one of the very first things that I did that thought was really cool.

Just FYI, that’s the Ground Zero Blues Club in Clarksdale, Mississippi, which is co-owned by Morgan Freeman. I’m performing there myself on January 15th.

+4, 5, 6

+8 and +8

Bullshit. You’re wrong, and deep down you know it.

...because of Carolina’s unblemished record...

Was Charles Darwin named as a co-defendant?

“Boy, that’s nothing compared to the story time he sodomized a pig with an aluminum-foil-covered baseball bat! I tell ya, it had us all so tickled!”