Unfortunately, it doesn't.

This.

"I'll take 'Redundant' for $500, Alex."

Don't forget cuckoldry.

When I was seven or eight years old, my mom and I went to Lambert Airport to pick up my dad from one of his frequent business trips. He always brought me a comic book, and as he was handing it to me, he pointed to an older gentleman about 30 feet away who was talking and laughing with a group of people. My dad tried…

"Sniff those Chiefs right off the proverbial nightstand!"

Deadspin Cardinal haters, you have a homework assignment.

Olbermann had the line of the night: "And the Carolina Panthers had the night off. They played the Tampa Bay Bucs."

Perhaps the horrendous slate of prime time games was a gesture of deference to the World Series?

By the way, please don't infer from this snarky comment that I didn't absolutely love this story, because I did.

"God, I would pay $200 to see a video clip of Peyton Manning going nuts on Greg Schiano."

Agree totally. I'll go further and say I'm someone who actually enjoys the suspense of finding out whether a call is going to be reversed or upheld. It's actually better than a commercial.

(I wonder if he rubbed one out before or after his snarky comment.)

you left out *facepalm. Or perhaps that was to be understood.

So, all you Deadspin people who keep bitching about Cardinals fans saying their team plays "the Right Way"... take heart that the St. Louis "football" team apparently takes pride in doing things the Wrong Way. It evens out, Yin/Yang. (The Blues come in smack in the middle.)

No.

+1 copy of The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway

Damn you, woman, with your eminent reasonableness!

Teams win or lose. Quarterbacks don't, ever.

I'm thinking it should be memorialized as Patriots Day.