there’s 12 fewer stones in Kirk’s Mortality Box this year and it’s still smarter than he is

like Mark Kelso’s Great Gazoo job?

his favorite band The Clash had a similar stay/go dilemma, whaddaya know

such a Fredo

lol anything can happen when these traditional rivals meet!

there was also a big kerfuffle in the general counsel’s office over who got the great honor of making sure all the application’s i’s were dotted

well he can forget about an endorsement from Procter and/or Gamble

During Wily Mo’s brief and otherwise useless stint with the Red Sox he hit the hardest HR I’ve ever seen in person. He absolutely murdered one that rocketed over the Monster in about 2.2 seconds and caromed off the light tower with a bong that would make Quasimodo weep

Good Christ, America: bleach goes in your eyeballs, Drano is for drinking.

there hasn’t been this much fuss about a second Schutt Air since the JFK assassination

even a baseball grandson: Mike Yastrzemski has been perfectly cromulent for the Giants 

I’m so old I remember when this dude was called Wily Mo Pena

or fettucine al-n-word

I bet Cuomo’s day goes well 

more or less what happened here when Air Up There hits the 720:

I’ll be honest, I thought the embodiment of Republican moral failure would have be bigger and taller, like Ben Shapiro

the ball came spinning out counterclockwise because of the Oriolis Effect

I think Liam has to  hook up with Brody to complete the spouse-swapping square and who knows, maybe find happiness finally

I wish she’d done that at an And1 gymnastics meet so they could’ve stopped the performance and had the crowd rush the mat with everybody going “OHHHHAAHHHH!!” and the on-floor MC yelling “IT’S OVER! IT’S OVER!! SIT DOWN RUSSELL WESTBROOK!!” and the whole thing dissolving into delirious chaos

it takes a bigger man than I to refrain from calling him Grundlemann