Sorority girl selfie skills? Usually pay double for that kind of action, Cotton.

I really hate to be flippant, but this is how I pictured Swem the whole time #Donald

Geez, enough about Ed Hochuli already.

I would have said: “Why yes, it does come from gay cows. The gayest, actually.”

I would love to see her debate that decomposing persimmon Donald Trump on the economy. Or anything for that matter.

Peter King: * reads excerpt* Yeah, this’ll do. *slips hand down his pants*

I prefer flesh beard.

I assume it’s because they want the artists to come off as innocent, pristine young girls to older men. It’s harder to fantasize about them if you know they have a boyfriend, I guess?

It’s quite alright. If you’ve been to Worcester, you’ve done your penance.

Let’s be Internet friends.

Now did they spell it “Wooster, Mass” or are you just messing with us here? The petulant Massholes among you must know.

In a word: Buffalo.

I can’t look at Tom Cruise anymore without seeing his jacked-up teeth.

Russell Wilson was also asked to comment on the potential fumble, but he passed.

Tag team match: these two jabronis vs. Huckabee’s large adults sons.

Two words. That’s all it took.

An average bicycle kick at best.

No, I meant that. I would literally have rather read his blog than watched that game last night.

The Niners are third and five .... 12 yards out from the honeypot.