Venture capitalists HATE public domain songs.

Sometimes you have to step away from the things you love to help them survive. 

England was where Rupert Murdoch practiced for Fox News. They’ve just got a head start on us. I’m sure we’ll be able to catch up.

Punts can get blocked! Safer to kneel four times, turn it over on downs, and ask the defense to score off a turnover.

The last thing the Bears need is a guy *more* likely to step on his own dick.

“It was more of an ‘oops, I forget you were vegetarian’ wrong, not a ‘we got busted trying to make Handmaid’s Tale a reality’ wrong."

Yep, the Bears could use—

Worst choice of sides since Operation Barbarossa.

Don’t you mean a few quarters of neck-and-neckbeard football?

Sir, that’s not a banana suit, it’s a yellow pantsuit. And this isn’t a Pac 10 game. It’s a Lane Bryant.

This is like saying you have to root for the guy who stole your puppy to win the Westminster Dog Show.

“[O]r really existed in the modern world at all, really.”

I’ll assume that if pressed, he would clarify that he only meant cheerleaders.

“Hit 'em where they tain't!"

Wrecked 'em? Heck, he practically killed 'em! 

That’s unfair.

+5000 Eschaton points

You should probably cc: your attorney if you do. 

Was that the guy who started Emtmann’s Doughmuts?

The poised and gritty ones do.