Ref immediately called for icing. 

Hi, Julianne, I’d like to add a few things to the list of worst things to happen in an office bathroom. I work in an office park and share a bathroom with about 10 other companies, you need a key to get in, but frequently find customers/clients of other tenants using the bathroom. Here’s just a little taste of what I…

He actually resigned several weeks ago, but he didn’t think he had to report it to the school.

+1 custard

“This is the day we have prepared for. Remember your training, do not get too close, keep the butter burgers coming and do not look him in the eye. May god have mercy on us all”

I’m available. I’ll let Aaron call the plays.

Sung to the tune of “The Heat Is On”:

Damn.  That’s only like 19 hours American

holy shit! thanks now I’ll have “tears in heaven” stuck in my head the rest of the day, I’ll be alone crying if anyone needs me.

Too soon.

Same thing happened to my friend- he got charged with assault and battery when he leveled Brad in accounting with a devastating elbow while he was distracted by a regional conference call.

Larkin was suspended just three games for the hit.

But enough about our President, folks. Let’s get to the rankings. 

I dealt with a brief bout of situational depression upon discovering it was not an actual woman. Something to look forward to, I guess. 

He picks up five-minute majors without any shame,
Then he picks up minors right after the game.
Dino. D-I-N-O Dino. D-I-N-O Dino.
*guitar strum*

The Detroit Lions have a play called the Roseanne Barr, a very unattractive play where Matt Stafford literally shits his pants and then throws an unadvised lateral to a RB that results in a fumble.

This may be the most Canadian thing ever.

Or you could just keep Don Cherry away from...well, everybody.  That might be more efficient.