My favourite is “Executive Assistant to the Assistant Executive”.

And, just like that, we all time-traveled back to the fifth grade.

Counterpoint: The majority of American actually are DUMB AS FUCK and need to have teeny tiny bits of information regurgitated down their throats like baby chicks in order to halfway grasp a topic.

I think this is defensible strategy. The public is stupid. Call me condescending all you want, but I read the polling data. I know precisely how vapid the American public can be, and just how irrational and ignorant their engagement with politics can be. People have short attention spans, are easily misled, push…

He was 16.  Even in Iowa, that’s a bit old for Middle School.

It’s a very large school—thousands of students, large building with three floors—and the bathrooms on the second and third floors were locked. They were locked 10 minutes before the end of each class period and 10 minutes after the start of the next. So there was no way students could use the bathroom unless they went…

Puts a whole new spin on “Sir, this is an Arby’s!”

It finally happened. We can finally, legitimately use this gag straight up:

You guys aren’t looking at the big picture. It rains diamonds on Neptune. Diamonds. What a score. If only there were a crew crazy enough to pull it off.

In seeking relevance, he turns to a 25 year old commercial slogan but then goes to the wrong fast food restaurant. It’s a perfect mix of incompetence and appealing to the olds that demonstrates he’s a legitimate Republican candidate.

Shut the fuck up tomato.

go to sleep and don’t wake up

I still want his financial information. Want that smoking gun that shows he was funded by laundered Russian money going through Deutsche Bank’s Estonia subsidiary.

What will you say when he loses, cunt?

It’s hard to argue that Hillary Clinton was “our best” in 2016. I voted for her because I couldn’t stand the idea of Trump as an alternative, but that doesn’t mean she was the “best” candidate the Democrats had to offer by any stretch (I don’t really think it was Bernie, either, but that’s a different argument).

What…

I  cannot laugh at this for the simple reason that for eight years The GOP, Fox News & significant portion of white America made it very clear that Barack Obama was somehow unfit for office & unqualified to President based on skin color and ugly stereotypes about black Americans. So the response was to elect, or in…

As soon as a person says something like “trump derangement syndrome” I can’t take anything else after that seriously. 

From that distance, they could’ve really used Scott Sterling.

who has actually helped our economy and made good on the promises that got him elected

In most cases the real world doesn’t end up affected by fiction to that degree. Then again, based on what people believed about the president to convince them to vote for him, I could be wrong.