(Cross-commenting)

Maybe Simmons is the Dane Cook of Sports-writing—all delivery, zero content.

“you’ve never worked with the general public before.”

I’ve been working with General Public so long, he was just Lieutenant Public when I got started.

“There’s no room in my life for a woman if I’m going to be a basketball coach.”

“My husband can’t throw these people under the bus and catch them at the same time!”

Thank you for your call, Tommy from Quincy!

Brady: [tosses these idiots under the bus]
These Idiots: [quickly deflate the tires]

Well we have come to realize the NFL cares more about something if it has balls.

He didn’t post that picture because he didn’t understand what you were trying to say.

I’m only 18 pages in, and already it looks like a grade school mural.

“Too many rules get in the way of leadership. They put you in a box. People set rules to keep from making decisions.”

"He just punched him square in the face for no reason? I don't buy it. Something else must be going on here. I bet Ford cut him off on the way into the gas station. Something like that. We'll just have to wait for the video. And if there is no video, who are we to judge this man? He may have been in fear for his life.…

A symptom of concussions is unequal pupil size. I think any faculty member at Michigan could tell you that lineman are obviously at risk in comparison to the average student.

The NCAA is ever supportive of America's student-athletes, especially in their academic pursuits, and for that reason the NCAA prides itself on fostering a culture of inquiry, critical thought, individualism, and self-awareness among its young people, right up until that self-awareness comes into conflict with the…

Ah yes. A late Degas, from his velvet period. Very rare, quite valuable.

I don't think football is going to lose spectator popularity any time soon, but there is going to be an even more drastic change in the demographic makeup of those who play it.

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