“I get the feeling that a man who says he eats avocado ice cream is a man who does not properly season his food”

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At least the Astros did it immediately and not 5 goddamn years after the fact. I can kinda sorta forgive mainstream sports networks if they want to make that easy connection for a year. The Katrina thing with the Saints was baffling and dumb.

Little Squeezers is #3? What the fuck is wrong with you people?

Back when Jets did the 2 slices of 8-corner and a drink for $5, I ate it once a week at bar trivia after work and I never got tired of it. I moved last year and I still miss Jets from time to time.

Don’t forget wax. It’s mostly just carnauba wax and corn syrup. God what a trash candy.

Lol at the Niners trading the probable 33-35th pick for 8 games from a backup QB. I’m sure they will try to extend him, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he takes one look around Santa Clara and tells John Lynch to go fuck himself.

12-12 then 12-13

The unfortunate flip side to so many mashed taters is a mound visit every 5 pitches to ask why so many taters are getting mashed.

The TRIALS and the TRIBULATIONS this apple must have gone through to get bruised up like that...

“Not flagrant”

In case you’re serious, advertisers aren’t paying for favorable opinions, they’re paying for views. A great way for a site to lose views is to shill for their advertisers. This is why most papers and magazines have separate editorial and marketing departments.

Which is the first part of the double entendre. Which is what makes it funny instead of weird.

Oh I would too. Re-reading my post I probably come off way too sanctimonious about it. I think he’s already the best regular color guy in the NFL. If/when he gets a little more practiced, I think he could go down as one of the best ever.

Lol, I like Romo too, but he just said “Derek Carr was just a twelve year old kid and he was getting pounded by a 30 year old man” or something close to it. I love that as much as the next deadspin shithead, but he’s still got some room to improve when it comes to live filtering his own thoughts.

I still don’t like the guy, but I was pretty proud of him when the 49ers matched Kaepernick’s $1 million donation to charities that focus on inequality. I can’t think of another owner that would’ve let that happen.

I hate to break it to you, but “Einstein’s beautiful E=mc^2" is really only applicable to very specific cases where total momentum is zero. It’s just the most famous example because it’s so simple, and therefore more accessible to laymen. There’s a reason they don’t put any of the more useful equations in cartoons

Reach-arounds are for selfish traitors

“That was a hard hit, but at least the entire team didn’t get sprayed with machine gun fire from the upper deck.”

Probably the same. Yo0000 Gabbert Gabbert has all the accuracy/decision making issues as Hoyer, but with absolutely no deep ball to kinda sorta make up for it.