“You want a pizza me? I artichoke you for what you just said.”

“That was the worst fight I’ve ever seen. Absolutely brutal.” - Dwight Howard

Unless you have another post in the pipeline, the money quote from the Times article is nowhere to be found on Deadspin. From John Skipper:

Definitely got some good wood on it. Can really still smack balls with force.

Coney just eager to get back to the bullpen so he can finish jerking off to the blonde with big tits in the bleachers.

No bat flip? These old-times have no respect for today’s game.

C’mon bro! Silence means yes, and yes means anal! Every frat bro knows that!

So Ben Roethlisberger didn’t explicitly say no, and Donald Trump took that as a yes? Interesting…

It would have been less embarrassing for the batter if Fernandez would have whipped his d-ck out and peed on him.

That news would never have made the light of day

The issue is losing the home front, like your government did in Vietnam. You better believe they would have continued bombing that country well into the 80ies, if it hadn’t become political suicide.

You don’t know shit about Muhammad Ali.

Seriously, about 16 years ago, I applied for a job as a closed captioner.

Man, that was fantastic.

De Gea it ain’t so.

Here’s hoping Stanton plugs the holes in his swing

Dinger? Sure. Dong? Fine. But I draw the line at “donger”!

Or, 2016 America: Where a black man rose up to become President and is now retiring and a woman may well replace him.

And yet somehow you’re the asshole if you so much as ask others to consider the idea of privilege.