Did somebody finally remind Ortiz that he plays baseball for a living?

I think I am being conspired against. I am all alone to watch a possible elimination game and the two things I was counting on to keep me sane, TBS and Deadspin, are both completely borked.

There was a drive-by in front of my apartment today. I dunno what happened but I figured I needed something to say if I wanted to post to see.

So, it's gonna be like this then?

THANK FUCK, TBS

I AM ALL ALONE WITH A CRANKY BABY, TBS. I NEED THIS FUCKING GAME.

Is there a way to listen to the game? out of the Boston/Tampa area?

fucking balls on a stick

Candid shots are particularly perilous for people with animated faces, who illustrate their speech with bulging eyes or distorted mouths. In person, they look lively and entertaining.

I have a friend that was honestly insulted that an ex hadn't commented when she changed her status to engaged.

Funny, that's the exact same reaction I have when I see cake.

I should be making an appearance at Old Town. HOWEVER. My drinky is starting at 4:30 so I cannot guarantee that I will make it nor how long it will last if I do.

@tonightineed: That's the ladder her boobs are going to use to escape.

@katie.bar.the.door: I could. If I was falling off a really tall building.

Wait, you're telling me that nachos were something that needed to be invented?

Quick! Someone get Baby Elephant Walk on the PA!

I would not have pegged Leanne as a SATC fan.

@BlondeGrlz: They will be prying my elastic waist jeans from my cold dead fat hands. I loved those thing so much.

@supermike5alive: Someday I would like to visit Boston and watch a Sox game with you. I bet it's like hanging out with a squirrel that's just dug a half a candy bar out of the garbage.

@dianersb: Jeanie!