My brother who is a new father thinks he has child rearing down and knows all the answers to life due to the fact that his girlfriend popped a baby out 3 weeks ago. I’m just like dude you don’t know shit, its been 3 weeks so you can say you are the best farther yet, I mean what life lessons have you taught your…

I snorted water out of my nostrils reading this. In my head it was like Rita Ora is in Paris and she says ‘Hi, I’m Rita Ora’ , and some tres classy french person, is like Rita Qui?

That was the worst.

The collab between Disney and Dali called Destino is trippy as fuck. Although I don’t know what it’d be like high.

You’ve given me so much hope!

Ohh haha you’re one of *those* sleepers. Unfortunately my movements are restricted to how much space my dog decides to leave me in my bed. Because kick and shove as I might, she will not budge

I still sleep with my first beanie baby. Yes I’m single. Yes I feel bad for moving him off the bed when I have a bed companion. Yes this is maybe why I’m single...

It was actually the guy who was the beanie collector (yay gender roles reversed) so it would be his experience (lol) that would finance the purchase of their house. Just had to say that

That’s bc we haven’t met yet!

God I hope not. I’m a fairly conscientious self butt checker, so, so far I haven’t felt or noticed the shorts above my cheeks although sometimes my shorts like to try

I by no means have a small ass and yet I’m lucky enough to find shorts to cover said ass. Sometimes it requires a bit of patience and time but that miraculous pair of so short almost too short shorts will find their way into your life. And you’ll see, angels will sing.

I think I get what Katia82 was trying to say. I think Buble was trying to be funny by pointing out the ridiculous shorts underwear the girl was wearing. but he ruined it with his hashtags and overlysmirky face. I mean I constantly point out to my friends and would not be above snapping a pic of someone wearing that.…

This makes me sad. I thought he was a nice guy just by the way he sings, but I stand corrected. Also despite his smug punchable face, he’s also looking hellllaaa delish. This makes me sadder. And final note, girls, shorts are meant to cover your ass, otherwise they are underwear! I love me my short shorts but guess…

Do NOT diss floral patterns. *harrumph*

Legit had the same question. And I realized that he’s been living under a rock his whole life which explains everything from his poor choice of beverage to his baffling lack of self awareness.

This deserves 1000 stars!!! as does Jena Friedman!

It just really annoys me how paternalistic broman is looking down on brogirl in that photo. She’s all like welp i’m a poor lil female needing a strong macho man to hold me in my arms. But I haven’t seen the film so perhaps I’m just projecting my feminazi opinions onto an already feminist movie bc bro it was written by…

Calvin Harris is pretty cute. How did I not know this. Tay can def write a song about me stealing her man.

I like that inadvertent pun. HIGH waist panties are HIGH fashion! *guffaws to myself* I'll see myself out now

She has a scandinavian name, not a silly name. #teamscarlett