You are the mouthbreather. Maybe neckbeard would have been more appropriate?

Similar mouth breather logic - “It’s not murder! I pushed the guy on the tracks but the train killed him!”

Great call on the Wolf Parade. I’d recommend a healthy dose of Handsome Furs to go along with that two album playlist.

That would mean the writers of this piece of satire did a spot on job then, right?

You. For thinking this is real.

You mean, “Los Angeles beat Los Angeles tonight.”

Watching Card’s fans get their wings ruffled is always pleasant.

And you’re not hearing what you want to hear? Waino legitimately said “Heyward didn’t want to have the burden of being the cornerstone guy, so he took less money to dodge the pressure.”

Her screams were met with great appall

The saddest part of her fall

It’s like some people are surprised normal human emotions surface in critical and stressful situations. Even though they're totally willing to excuse a cop who feared for his life shooting an unarmed civilian under any circumstances.

F.) Birdman was a revenant.

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing top flight swingmen that defense doesn't exist.

When is it OK to start maybe thinking TV, internet porn, video games, and fame culture are partially to blame for all this? I’m not saying BAN IT ALL, but like guns, easy access to these things can have extremely horrible and far reaching consequences.

Exactly! Take home essay where I can google and do research versus in class with no help? I’ll take the take home exam in the comfort of my pjs.

Conspiracy Theory - David Stern asked Adam Silver to tell Bill Kennedy and Doc Rivers to deny this TRUE story for one reason: to ruin the credibility of Tim Donaghy even more.

Of fucking course Chuck would play the cancer card when talks of his potential firing come up. Of fucking course.

“Gay flagged for being too flamboyant”

Agreed. Tracy’s post would have been better titled “Great Women in History Who Were Forced to Run Shit Behind The Scenes.” Leave the video angle out the post entirely.

That's one of the smoothest things I’ve ever seen a white guy do.