What do you do with your fishing hat?

This is such sweet relief to the parents of Newtown. It was an act!

Yeah, he didn’t leave Allison for Beth. #hitemwiththehein

Always wear shit gloves on race day so you don’t care about tossing them aside.

They are running in fishing hats. What is more “dad” than that?

Proof you don’t need fancy running gear to finish a marathon.

I tried to explain to the man yesterday what Coachella was. The best I could do was “Marnie’s wedding plus cash bar plus a lot of bad feet in sandals.”

I make my own patterns. I create graph paper in Excel and play around with it. And then I buy DMC colors that I like.

I sometimes stitch while drinking wine. I’m so relaxed, I can’t even.

My job is my job. My catharsis is cross-stitching and no one can take that from me.

slubbing

Yes, that is 100% true.

I just looked up the SWHC stock price. Too bad what happened to United didn’t happen to Smith & Wesson.

I love how Blackish tackled the “Santa is white” topic. Basically, kids want presents and they could give a fuck the color of the bearded fat man or woman giving them out.

Wait, sex is an option? Like, good sex?

In Chicago, the Bulls play at the United CENTER. Coincidence??

Is the Holocaust Center like a mall? Or like a sports arena, like the Staples Center? Does Sean spell it fancy, like Centre?

The stupid. It burns.

There are too many toothpastes. I mean, I get it because capitalism. Just give me some paste with fluoride, floss, and an occasional swish of fluoride rinse. My life already has too many choices.