“Hi! It looks like you’re trying to run an A-2 Gap Slant? Would you like help running an A-2 Gap Slant?”

Funny, Adrian Peterson’s son’s face is imprinted on his cleats too.

When money dies, where does it go?

Because “Antonio Brown” has like 7 guitar solos and Josh Norman just bought his first Squier Stratocaster 16 months ago and he’s still learning his scales. He can do “Big Me” by Foo Fighters, though.

Wide deceiver???

Sounds like my ex wife!!!

Bring back fat kickers.

Big scoop rhymes with ‘big poop.’

MRSA YIPS is an anagram of Irsay PMS.

Nice try, Peter.

Let’s all hope this is the beginning of a long and bitter rivalry between the city of Montreal and the entire state of Kansas.

Du Li noted.

Thanks for stopping by Mark Madden

LeBron James wears 23

Why would I ever go down to the train tracks when you never invite me over?

One time I fought and thanked God.

Forget Instagram, James. Next time just put it on Peeiscope.

*Diana’s 83rd call to Temple’s University Relations Dept.*

For once the Browns won’t even have to draft a quarterback to guarantee themselves a bunch of picks.