I wonder how the ISPs are going to screw us on this one...

White man slapping a Black Bear.

Am I the only one wondering if he has something to base that figure on, or did he just pull it straight out of his ass?

I think you meant thief, but you get the star for the effort.

I'm sorry. I know I don't "get" fashion, but I seriously have no idea who wakes up and says

Yes, but this was the real crime.

But those curators are so well trained. How could this have happened?

I don't know you. We have never met. But after viewing this - and dragging me into the subsequent waking nightmare - I have come to one conclusion:

For a moment I read "Wedgiegate" and had horrific flashbacks of 6th grade gym class...

To everyone saying that talking to the press is not his job...
Um. Yes it is.
Do a quick search for NFL Player Contract and have a good look at Paragraph 4. I added the bold and italics.

Fraud? In college athletics?

I am going to blame you for my nightmares tonight.

I have seen a lot of people questioning how or why this upgrade would be free - even speculations that after the year there would be charges or subscriptions. I don't think it's quite that nefarious, but I do think there is a monetary component to this:

Tie Belichick to a chair prominently displayed at the entrance to the UoP stadium. Give everyone one slap - hard and fast - across the face.

source = sarcasm...

Awkward...

Commence Operation VacuSuck.

Or that you're a professional athlete.