She was originally going to go with Summer Eve, but decided that would be too douchey...

"You must go back in time and give Obama's dad a condom."

These people are idiots. Everyone knows that you only have to stop him from planting the birth certificate in HI.

See, I'm on the opposite end of things here.

Not only are anti-vaxxers endangering lives, they are actually harming the cause they should be more concerned about. Autism research. Do you know how many ridiculous and expensive studies have happened in order to convince these morons that vaccines do not cause Autism? Meanwhile studies on effective treatments and…

I'm all for "reasonably clean" as a standard myself.

I prefer to live with myself. I don't need a piece of paper to define my relationship.

If you get divorced from yourself do you lose half of your stuff?

oh he can certainly mess with the queen bee

Thank you so much. It was 4.5 years ago, and I still think about it all the time. I wish she would have had someone to talk to, when she hadn't slept for almost seven straight days after her 2nd child's birth, who would say, let me help you. One of our friends always checks in with us on the anniversary of the day…

I mean, you start going too light and you're ending up in 'mint' territory, and everyone knows that mint isn't teal. Duh. This is just like, basic logic.

They should have told me I was going to get postpartum depression. They should have told me I would be hospitalized for it and suicidal thoughts. They should have told me I would need to leave my career so I could continue an intensive outpatient program. They should has told me I would spend months trying to find a…

I hate laundry with the heat of 1000 fiery suns. Laundry drains me of the will to live.

hahaha I love how fucking practical you are. YOU should write a "no one warned me about the laundry" essay that we can all share on Facebook with the caption "so many tears!" and "so true!" and "she gets it!"

As a mother that suffered with post-partum depression and had several nervous breakdowns while being a stay-at-home parent to my two children, blogs like this make me feel guilty and ashamed. I have to remind myself that it's not a purely wonderful experience for many of us, and that's normal, too.

Exactly.

"They should've warned me that eating healthy, proper portions of food would create enough of the nourishing milk that my daughter needs to grow. That I wouldn't even want to diet at first, at all. That hearing at her two-week doctor appointment that she'd gained enough weight..."

They should've warned me that I would indeed get my nails done, but that I would sit in the pedicure chair texting her father compulsively because I missed them.

What an insufferable cunt. And I really, really try never to use that word.

I'll tell you what nobody warned me about: All the goddamned laundry. We went from doing laundry maybe twice a week to doing it three or four times A DAY. (Granted, we had twins, but still.) Even having lived through it, I still do not understand how they generate so much laundry.

youre a bitch. i bet some poor, nice fucking girls in axo are freaking the fuck out during their FIRST WEEK OF CLASSES because your article now reigned hell on their sorority. i bet theyre having to deal with their nationals and will be getting shit on as a chapter for the next two fucking years. honestly fuck you.