“How do you do, fellow kids?”

This might’ve been interesting if it was a reverse Shallow Hal. Schumer wakes up one day looking like Emily Ratajkowski, but she can’t see it. In her mind, she’s still Amy Schumer. Society starts treating her differently because she’s gorgeous and has a huge rack now. It could shine a harsh light on society.

Meanwhile, Krustophenia sits on the shelf!

I’d like to eat some chorizo tacos with her. Corn tortillas, of course, with cebolla and cilantro.

Simpson’s did it!

I prefer the real scorpion king:

He has a sex scene in this, so you can see Jean-Luc’s prickhard.

Distracted Boyfriend meme of the year?

RIP Colonel Leslie “Hap” Hapablap.

Condolences to his husband, Jack Black.

AV Club, have the goddamn courtesy of giving R. Lee Ermey an obituary.

They should write a certain message on their hands, as a reminder:

Must. Crush. DC.

*Spike Lee just tweeted condolences to George Foreman*

Still the best use of the Marina Towers, and also Steve McQueen’s best car chase:

If I don’t come home from a show without at least three bruises, I consider it a dull affair.

They should fight. In a strip club. In a pool of baby oil.

That man who pretended to drown sexually assaulted the lifeguard. And it’s played for laughs. It’s fucking gross. Call me a killjoy, but I think that because this is not to my taste, no one else should be able to enjoy it.

Bill Hader looks more like the stuttering kid, with the lanky body, and pale skin. McAvoy is too fit and handsome.

He looks like Marlon Brando in Last Tango in Paris.